Two Very Different Women…

Unless, the career woman gets “bored” with the relationship and decides she wants some “space”. Or the man gets too “uppity” and doesn’t want to wash dishes. etc. In other words, two people who are so similar to each other, so “equal”, are little more than living together as girlfriend/boyfriend. As Frank Sinatra put it (probably his songwriter did), love is a tender trap.

My sister in the middle of her second divorce, called me up to complain that all “THIS” wouldn’t be nesessary if he could just understand that she needs her own life, too! I think that if you want a life of your own you shouldn’t get married or have kids.

Two people can have a lifelong loving relationship without the Husband/ king and master-wife/servant and babymaker mentality. I’ve seen it… I know it exists.

I like to play out of the box a little and criticize the author, Eric, moreso than the self-absorbed woman he was overhearing. We all know about these kinds of women and can criticize them, but let’s focus on us men in how our attitudes contribute to the problem.

His romantic ideal sounds remarkably similar to what the princess was saying she wanted. And such relationships do exist: Yuppie #1 meets Yuppie #2, move in together, get married, have 1.2 kids, and live happily ever after.

Unless, the career woman gets “bored” with the relationship and decides she wants some “space”. Or the man gets too “uppity” and doesn’t want to wash dishes. etc. In other words, two people who are so similar to each other, so “equal”, are little more than living together as girlfriend/boyfriend. As Frank Sinatra put it (probably his songwriter did), love is a tender trap.

Such relationships seem like asexual reproduction which make bonding difficult. If someone is that independent, how do they pair with someone else? Career and liberated women start to think about settling down in their 30′s just as men start to gain serious sexual power.

The original feminist generation was sold a Marxist bill of goods (what else did “Red Betty” have to sell?) about the nature of work and what it means to be a woman.
The Baby Boomer woman who bought into it and their daughters are reaping the fruits of that idiocy now. I don’t know what anybody else’s life is like but in mine angry 50 year old women are all over the place and the more “educated” they are, the angrier they are. Their daughters are in sexual confusion because their heads have been told that only lesbians are “real women” while their bodies and emotions are sending opposite messages.
The Baby Boomer women are hopeless cases. They staked their lives on the “career”-”All men are rapists” nonsense and lost. I still wonder how they felt when Gloria Steinem hauled off and got MARRIED at 61, not something the average 61 year old woman can do. That must have been like hearing that Dr Martin Luther King, Jr went to work as “Bull” Connor’s houseboy. Too bad.
I’ve had enough of this nonsense. I limit my contact with women very carefully, take no shit and find myself quite happy. American women have a vastly inflated view of their toughness, value and intelligence.

When 2nd wave feminism discovered the neat sleight-of-hand by imposing Marxist class-warfare language onto gender relations (hence our beloved “gender wars”), it also accomplished beyond rhetorical polarization a grievous and violent interpersonal divide between women and men.

Relating to one’s opposite gender automatically became a contest instead of a dance, a zero-sum power struggle instead of a mutually respectful negotiation.

Every bourgeois, chivalrous, or feminine romantic sentiment had to be deconstructed and interrogated and debunked within the new feminist ideology of the Evil Patriarchy and ubiquitous female victimhood.

Occasionally one comes across heretical voices from unlikely sources.

Excerpts from the first three pages of Dr. Laura Schlessinger’s book – The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands. (Bad marketeering title with condescending undertones, but the text is another story.)

“There isn’t a day that goes by when I don’t ask at least one woman caller on my radio program if she expects to stay married considering her hostile, dismissive, or undermining attitude and actions toward her husband. What is amazing is how surprised they all seem to imagine that their husbands might have a limit to how much they’ll take before they tune out or turn away.

What is even more amazing is that this insensitivity to their husband’s needs and feelings goes hand in hand with a hypersensitivity about any action or reaction from men – reactions that are usually more than reasonable.

What causes this double-standard mentality? In one big, hyphenated word: self-centeredness. And what is the source of this self-centeredness? I believe it’s a result of the women’s movement, with its condemnation of just about everything male as evil, stupid, oppressive, and the denigration of female and male roles in families …” (L.S.)

(And, to give the opposing voice it’s nod –)

“The idea of a wife starts to sound pretty good -having someone do your laundry, cheer every time you walk in the door, have dinner waiting for you when you get home. In the words of a female friend of mine: ‘Who wouldn’t want one of these wives? I’d like a wife!’ The problem is, who wants to be one?”

(From a book review by Jennifer Burgess)

http://www.womenwriters.net/winter05/ProperCareandFeedingofHusbands1.htm

“Whatever. Personally, I’d prefer someone who was confident in themselves & whose life I could share in and vice versa, without insecurity, d/s roles, and fundie stereotypes coming into play…. Or in other words: I prefer not to be terminally barefoot & pregnant and chained to the stove.”

Anyone beginning a refutation with the phrase “Whatever” generally isn’t the brightest bulb, having been educated in such a manner as to avoid the least possibility of learning critical thought processes.

Virtually ALL women prefer men who are “confident in themselves”.

As for that particular knucklehead’s aspirations to “share life” with someone, without “insecurity, d/s roles, and fundie stereotypes”, she probably ought to throw in “world peace” as well as “the end of poverty as we know it”.

She seems to be another example of ideological programming, with aspirations to entitlement, victimhood and self-centeredness already planted in the space between her ears.

As for her fear of being “terminally barefoot & pregnant”, she undoubtedly misses the point that plenty of women in their late 30′s, 40′s, and even 50′s are urgently seeking precisely that particular state of affairs for themselves.