It’s deja vu all over again, another attractive white woman is missing. Michelle Gardner-Quinn, a 21-year-old senior attending the University of Vermont, vanished in the early morning hours of Saturday, October 10, 2006. Michelle was last seen at around 2:15 AM walking home alone after a night of bar hopping.
This story does not merit national coverage, it should be of local interest only. It should serve as a cautionary tale for the young coeds of the University of Vermont: If you do something stupid like walk home alone after a night of drinking – bad things might happen to you.
For those readers with a limited intellectual capacity, let me stress that I’m not saying that Michelle got what was coming to her. I’m simply stating the obvious: Michelle had no business walking home, in the middle of the night, in an inebriated state.
The Burlington Police Department, UVM authorities, canine teams, the Vermont State Police, and the FBI are all searching for clues in the disappearance of Michelle. This is patently ridiculous, shouldn’t the FBI be looking for terrorists and other criminals? All these law enforcement agencies are expending their time and resources looking for one foolish young lady?
Of course FOX News is all over this story, when they are not propping up the Bush administration they are reporting on another missing white woman. Stop the presses! Call the National Guard! Get the FBI on the case! Another attractive white woman is missing, and the world must stop spinning on its axis until her fate is known.
Maybe I should spread the rumour that Michelle is really a light-skinned Hispanic so that the FBI will stop wasting taxpayer money searching for a coed who had too much too drink and too little common sense.
The Associated Press provides this description of the missing young lady:
“Michelle is 5 feet 8 inches tall, and approximately 135 pounds. She has a stud piercing in her nose and was last seen wearing a gray peacoat, green button-up cardigan sweater, a light blue T-shirt, and a black Puma purse with white straps.”
If a member of the public finds her, I hope they notify the authorities immediately, so that the Vermont State Police and the FBI will stop wasting their time investigating a local matter.
I hope Michelle is found safe and sound, but I’m sick of the coverage already. Memo to FOX News: There’s a wingnut dictator setting off nuclear bombs in North Korea. ÂÂÂ
