Thanks.
A successful married man with young children at home pursues a romantic liaison with a co-worker. When the co-worker doesn’t sufficiently reciprocate his affections, he stalks her boyfriend for two months, and devises a plan to kill him. He collects weapons, disguises himself, packs up some garbage bags to dispose of the body, and drives 900 miles to attack his rival. He launches the assault but the boyfriend manages to escape and notify the police, and the man is arrested and charged with attempted murder.
Would CBS commentator Harry Smith express sympathy for this “poor” fellow for “falling in love” and then “crash-landing”? Would Fox News commentator Steve Doocy opine that “love makes you do weird things,” and claim that prosecutors were being too hard on him?
Would MSNBC describe him as a stressed out “super dad” who “snapped”, ignoring that the two months of stalking and preparation sure were a long, slow “snap”? Would MSNBC have a psychologist sympathetically explain that the would-be murderer acted because he was “experiencing the fear of abandonment” that was “so terrifying” that he had to “secure the love object and eliminate the threat”? Would a reporter for a major newspaper describe the murder attempt as the man’s effort to “share with someone else a bit of the pain swelling inside”?
Lisa Nowak is receiving widespread sympathy, in part because she is legitimately admired for being an astronaut. But a large share accrues because she’s a woman, and our society—both men and women—views women’s misdeeds more sympathetically than men’s.
The media is soft-pedaling numerous aspects of the Nowak case. Practically every media outlet has explained Nowak’s decision to wear astronaut diapers on her journey to allegedly attack romantic rival Colleen Shipman as a bizarre, freakish action indicative of her mental instability. In reality, Nowak acted with logic and calculation—she did not want to stop several times on the way from Houston to Orlando and leave a trail of convenience store camera records behind her. For the same reason, when Nowak arrived in Orlando she disguised herself, checked into a hotel under a fake name and address, and paid cash.
Similarly, numerous commentators have described Nowak’s equipment–a 4-inch folding knife, a steel mallet, several garbage bags, rubber tubing, a BB gun, and pepper spray–as “wacky” or “bizarre.” They are nothing of the sort. Orlando police believe Nowak intended to kill Shipman, and she probably planned to utilize the garbage bags to dispose of her, perhaps in Galveston Bay. As Orlando police Sgt. Barbara Jones explained, it was a “fairly elaborate plan.”
In widely-reported comments, Dr. Jon Clark, a former NASA flight surgeon, said that Nowak may have come unhinged due to the burdens of being a female astronaut. According to Clark:
“They made more sacrifices than the ‘right stuff’ guys. They have to balance two careers, be a mom, wife and an astronaut. You don’t come home at night, like most of the male astronauts, and have everything ready for you.”
Space travel is and always will be hazardous, but the astronauts of the dawn of the space age depicted in The Right Stuff faced far more danger and uncertainty than today’s astronauts do. The assertion that astronauts today–even women astronauts with families–deal with greater stress is dubious.
One major newspaper sadly lamented Nowak’s “meltdown”, a term usually used to describe a performer’s onstage temper tantrum, not an apparent murder attempt. One commentator labeled Nowak an “unfortunate” individual who “has been the subject of relentless news coverage…[and] hounded and beleaguered by the press,” an unusually sympathetic description of the media attention people bring upon themselves when they try to kill someone.
Nowak’s neighbors have lent her their support, and both her former Naval Academy classmates and a Florida restaurateur are raising money for her legal defense. And, of course, a movie about Nowak’s life is in the works.
Nowak was let out on a light $25,500 bail and, except for those grumpy Orlando prosecutors, most are trivializing what she did. In 2002, Scott Peterson killed Laci Peterson and disposed of her body in San Francisco Bay. Except for the fact that Nowak botched the job, is her alleged crime much different?
This article first appeared in the Philadelphia Daily News (2/26/07).
Jeffery M. Leving is one of America’s most prominent family law attorneys. He is the author of the new HarperCollins book Divorce Wars: A Field Guide to the Winning Tactics, Preemptive Strikes, and Top Maneuvers When Divorce Gets Ugly. His website is www.dadsrights.com.
Glenn Sacks’ columns on men’s and fathers’ issues have appeared in dozens of America’s largest newspapers. Glenn can be reached via his website at www.GlennSacks.com or via email at Glenn@GlennSacks.com.
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fourthwire said,
Yet poor Lisa simply was faced with a horribly stressful situation (albeit one of her own choosing!). Nobody forced her to become an astronaut. Nobody forced her to become a mother. Hell,…… nobody forced her to even marry.
The major difference between Nowak and Scott Peterson is one of efficiency at killing………. not to mention one of them was born with a vagina, and one with a penis.
The one born with a vagina is getting sympathy for her alleged murder attempt.
What happened to “equality”, girls?
March 5, 2007 at 5:15 pm
Denis said,
March 5, 2007 at 5:51 pm
fourthwire said,
And notice how many women seem to be reluctant to CONDEMN those women enjoying those advantages!
Why wasn’t there similar to that outrage that feminists and misguided chivalrists express for male psychos who are caught in blatant attempts to commit kidnapping and murder?
Where are the Wendy McElroys and other “good” feminists’ voices on the subject of Lisa Nowak and her “harrowing experience”?
This sorry pity-party for the psycho-bitch, with it’s complete absence of condemnation is a fair example of why NOBODY who calls herself a feminist truly believes in equality.
Men are routinely handled much more harshly than Nowak has been treated….. simply for missing their child support or vaginamony payments.
March 5, 2007 at 6:11 pm
The Vicar said,
He knew he was married and so did she, both ignored commitments they made to their respective spouses and children, thinking only of their own passions.
NASA ignored or disregarded where this might lead and or the consequences it may have (impacted) on the image of the agency and the astronaut corps. For high profile individuals this is very important.
I can’t believe that someone in NASA didn’t know that this was going on between them.
I feel that the stress of the job has some aspect to it in this case, but I believe that morals play the biggest part here.
And I do agree with Glenn. If a man had done the same thing he’d still be behind bars. Either way, her career is shot, but you can bet a book and TV movie deal is in the works.
March 5, 2007 at 6:25 pm
amfortas said,
The Nowak case is one more step toward the carnage that is coming. How the f*ck this woman got to be a Navy Captain is beyond sense. She is the best of the best of women?? God help us all. She is the Captain Queeg of the generation and just one more slightly higher profile nail in the coffin of peace between men and women.
While all the pussy-stroking goes on, men’s tolerance and patience is running out. Even the Wendys and the Teris are having a hard time being taken seriously. The ‘good feminists’ are unable to defend even themselves so long as they hang onto the fascist benefits of femonazism.
Dark clouds abuilding will do more than just delay a launch into the firmament. The rains of retribution are coming.
March 5, 2007 at 10:55 pm
fourthwire said,
Have the Navy and NASA’s standards really fallen so low that Lisa Nowak managed to infiltrate our country’s finest…… and instead of reacting to her deranged actions with horror, NASA SYMPATHIZES with her “harrowing experience”?
Hell’s bells……….. it’s time to clean out the cess-pool that feminism has created, in our nation’s military, education systems, government, and mainstream media.
And you had better believe that the Wendy’s and the Teris are having a difficult time being taken seriously by men. Nothing odd there - anyone who does not out-and-out condemn what feminism has become, and condemn their corrosive influence on society shouldn’t hold her breath waiting to be taken seriously.
Truth be told, I consider the Wendy’s and Teri’s to be apologists for feminism, eager to put a “kinder, gentler” face on the worst dregs of American womanhood in the past four decades.
Oh they give lip service to men’s rights, all right….. but for the most part they don’t take the battle into the bitches’ dens, and certainly DO NOT openly call for women’s superior reproductive, social, civil, and legal rights to be rolled back.
Phyllis Schlafly wrote that “our girls will have to fight their girls”. And so far neither Teri nor Wendy, nor any other “good feminist” seem to want to mix it up with hell-hags like Kim Gandy and her group of goons.
You’re pretty close to the mark when you write that “men’s tolerance and patience are running out”, Amfortas.
And the vast majority of American women are so self-centered, not to mention brain-washed by their own, they might not notice men’s growing contempt for some time yet.
March 5, 2007 at 11:49 pm