My new co-authored column, Child Support System Ignores Dads’ Economic Reality (Chicago Sun-Times, 4/14/07), responds to the Sun-Times‘ father-bashing news story State’s deadbeat dads owe $3 billion–Deadbeat parents owe $3 billion in Illinois alone, $100 billion nationwide. When parents refuse to honor child support, their kids pay. And so do you (4/8/07).ÂÂÂ
The story was on the front page of the Sun-Times with the huge headline “The 12 Worst Dads in Illinois.” I do commend the Sun-Times for its willingness to publish such criticism.
To write a Letter to the Editor of the Chicago Sun-Times regarding Child support system ignores dads’ economic reality (4/14/07), write to letters@suntimes.com.
In the column family law attorney Jeffery M. Leving and I wrote:
“The Sun-Times tells us that ‘divorce lawyers joke that high-earning husbands come down with ‘AIDS’ after a divorceâ€â€Â‘Acquired Income Deficiency Syndrome.’’ Yet if one tries thinking of divorced fathers as people instead of as villains, it’s not hard to see why some dads earn less money after a divorce.
“Divorce is a psychologically shattering event for fathers, usually more so than for mothers. Fathersâ€â€Ânot mothersâ€â€Âare often cut off from their children. Many suffer from depression. A divorced father is ten times more likely to commit suicide than a divorced mother, and three times more likely to commit suicide than a married father.
“The vast majority of divorces are initiated by women, not by men. Research shows that most of these do not involve a serious transgression by the men, such as violence or adultery, but instead because the women feel unappreciated or emotionally unfulfilled. From a man’s perspective, this often means that his wife: ended the marriage against his will; took his children out of his everyday life; and harmed his kids by breaking up the stable, two-parent home they once enjoyed. Then she demanded that he dramatically lower his standard of living in order to finance her decision. It’s not hard to see why men who once worked hard to support their families may be too disheartened to make the same sacrifices under these new conditions.
“Mothers often violate fathers’ already meager visitation rights, and sometimes alienate their children from them. Some mothers move far away in order to frustrate fathers’ contact with their children, while others make spurious accusations of abuse. Fathers are sometimes financially ruined by divorce–legal bills are huge, and they are often compelled by courts to pay their ex-wives’ legal costs, too.
“Given the myriad injustices and problems fathers face when dealing with the family law system, it isn’t surprising that there are divorced fathers who don’t pay their child support. What’s surprising is that so many do.”
Read the full column here.
|
