Penny for your thoughts?
Yesterday, my 4-year-old son and I were at the supermarket. There was a large and colorful display for Jelly Belly jelly beans, with all sorts of varieties and flavors. He asked for “the red one,” and I put up a bag to the container and pulled the lever. Several jelly beans fell into the bag, as a little girl stood by looking on. She must have been 5 years old. The girl gazed at the beautiful display, spellbound.
We got in line for checkout. The little girl’s mother was waiting in the checkout line next to us. She asked her mother if she could have some jelly beans too. Her mother said no. The girl replied, “Please, Mommy? Please can I have some jelly beans?” Again, the mother refused, saying, “I’m not going to buy you that garbage. You already eat those pop-tarts, and you don’t need any sugar.” The girl kept begging. “Mom, can’t we put the pop-tarts away? Maybe I could get some jelly beans instead.” Mom finally grabbed the girl, and whispered “Shut up! Shut your damn mouth. Now!”
The little girl started crying and moved away. Mom moved toward her to grab her again. The girl shook in fear, and hid behind another woman who was with the mom. She looked to me like she was expecting a beating. Mom was looking bitter and quite angry.
All of this was in plain view and earshot of my son and me, only a few feet away. As we moved forward in the line, I noticed that he had watched everything. He had been given some jelly beans, and was grateful. But he seemed very serious and quiet, upon seeing the scene of this little girl and her mom. I wanted to draw him out, learn what he was thinking, talk about it. Instead of saying, “Did that make you sad?” I simply asked him, “How did that make you feel?”
I was expecting him to say some emotion, like “sad” or “scared”… Instead, he simply replied, “I love you, Dad. I miss you when you’re at work.” Sitting in the shopping cart, he reached out and gave me a hug. Four years old.
My heart just melted. I cherish every moment I have with him. I wished that other lady would only realize what a precious gift she has in her daughter.
| More from John Dias
Stumble It!
July 10th, 2007 at 12:56 pm
When I was at my truck’s dealership, getting an oil change, I saw a woman yank her son by the arm so hard I’m surprised it didn’t pop out of the socket. The little boy had been running around, but his behavior didn’t strike me as particularly unruly. I stared, but said or did nothing. Who would believe a man when a woman starts lying? It’s sad to think that little children must spend so much of their formative lives with such monsters. There really should be a Violence Against Children Act VACA, targeting the primary perpetrators of child abuse (biological mothers) with billions of dollars in federal funding.
Child Fatalities 2004
One things for sure, you’ll never see any stories about this on any of our corrupt (misandrist) main stream media, news outlets.
July 10th, 2007 at 2:16 pm
John that is awesome! I have an eight year old (going on 18) and occasional does similar stuff out of the blue. I love it. I also have seen some of the ugliness that mothers have done in public. Slapping and screaming at kids in public in front of who knows who is quite barbaric. Where are the social workers when that happens. I have actually commented to a mother doing such things and the exact answer I got was “Mind your own god-Bleep business!” So I asked the clerk to look up the phone number for social services. The mother then grabbed her kid and left quickly leaving her basket in line. The great part is a couple nearby thanked me. It’s a shame parents (male or female) must resort to such behavior in public. If you know your kids are hellions in public, don’t bring them. My boy learned early on not to be a brat in public. After the first month of not be able to come with either of us to the store or restaurants he got the hint. Even though a finger flick to the ear has also gotten his attention when needed just as well. Again John, great post. A good read at the end of a long and boring day.
July 10th, 2007 at 2:54 pm
Thanks John, I loved that story.
July 10th, 2007 at 7:34 pm
Thats great!!! celebrate that inside all the time. They took that chance away from me, and due to pretty much everyone siding with an other, i dont even have any pictures (and i was lucky to have a paper that said i had joint custody!).
some people are really really lucky… some arent… i am glad that some are lucky!! and i would rather have it that way, than everyone not be lucky.
July 10th, 2007 at 8:27 pm
I’m sure if you ask the lady, her terrorizing behavior was “in the best interests of the child”.
July 10th, 2007 at 8:46 pm
Sent this to my 20 Y.O. daughter,, she spent the last 11 years with me and we have a good relationship..
She knows I love her more than life itself..
Excellent story.
July 10th, 2007 at 8:49 pm
OH,, and I might add,, discipline is a consant process,, they HAVE to know you won’t take any crap and YOU have to be consistent and REASONABLE to the age of the child..
I had great results with explaining why yes or no…
They’re not stupid and will respect you if you earn it.
None of this “because I said so” BS..
July 10th, 2007 at 10:21 pm
A father and mother ought to be responsible for character formation throughout a child’s life.
I expect each of us, I’m on top of the list, until death are tempted to lie, be unkind or impatient, stingy, or undependable.
Parents have authority to confront their child (privately without embarrassment).
A child with excellent character honors their father and mother.
July 10th, 2007 at 11:38 pm
John, that was such a pleasure. God knows we need more real life love like that on here. Our minds are suffused in ‘points’ but our souls need the nourishment of the ‘picture’ you give us here.
July 11th, 2007 at 6:22 am
I think this shows why so many of our boys are on ritalin, most women can not handle active childern. In my kids school they actually have rules of behavior in the lunch room, no loud talking is one of them. How stupid. Childern need to have time to be kids and to have fun.
My wife and I have taught our childern how to act in public, a lesson I learned from my mom. Act out in the store and we just leave. I did it once as a child, and learned fast that if I wanted to be with them I had to behave.
July 11th, 2007 at 12:35 pm
Along similar lines:
I am at a woman’s house for dinner.
She has three children each by a different man.
She is a “single mom,” of course.
The oldest child is a boy of about 12.
He comes up to me and starts telling me that he can do X pullups (I can’t remember the number — but an impressive number whatever it was).
I tell him that is very impressive and start talking about how many pullups I could do years ago when I was in Airborne training in the army.
The mother literally screams at him. “All you talk about is exercising — go to your room!!!! Let the adults speak. I am sick of hearing about exercising.”
He dutifully leaves the room looking like a beat puppy.
That young man was starving for approval. He was also starving for attention for a male figure. I had known him for just a few minutes but I was it.
I felt so sad, but when I saw the way she treated him, I knew I would never be arround her or her boy again. I liked him much better than her.
July 11th, 2007 at 1:41 pm
I have my seven year old son for ten days during this summer.
When he first arrived, he was filled with physical energy. So much that is boiled over into his conversation that he blurts words out.
Since we have been playing outside each day, he is in better control of his behavior and speech.
I wonder why son’s elementary school eliminated physical activates in the curriculum. I sense that physical activity may benefit boys more than ADD drugs.
July 12th, 2007 at 12:21 am
John Dias,
While your story was in part difficult to read, I am grateful for men, (and women), like you who love, teach, respect and cherish their children.
I am very happy for your son that he has you and very happy that you have him too.
July 12th, 2007 at 4:23 am
Yes, yes, things like the bond between parent and child, behavior in public (including by mothers), physical activity, father as role model, a healthy diet, cherisihng your children, etc., those things are all nice, but unimportant. What really matters is whether mom gets her “child support” paycheck for making the children fatherless in full and on time. Just ask anybody in government what’s important, and you will know this to be true. Remember, government knows best!
Who cares if little Johnny is starving for male approval, not allowed to exercise, gets smacked around by his single mother in public for doing boy things, or if he is dosed up on Ritalin all day to make him act more like a good little girl. What really matters is whether his estranged father has the medical insurance paid up so his mother doesn’t have to spend her hard earned child support check on drugging little Johnny’s problems away.