The Stepmother’s Bill of Rights

Thursday, August 2, 2007
By Glenn Sacks

Stephanie M., a stepmom and frequent commenter on my blog, has some interesting thoughts on a “Stepmother’s Bill of Rights.” Apparently the idea first came from “The Wicked Stepmom” blog. Stephanie’s post and the Bill of Rights appear below. Many of my readers either are stepmothers or are divorced fathers who have remarried–what do you think of this list? Is it workable? Does it demand too much? Should there be more “rights” included? I’m interested in your thoughts.  

Stepmother’s Bill of Rights

I found the following on The Wicked Stepmom’s blog and thought it was a good creed for all stepmothers out there.  Some pieces of it are obviously more delicate than others, but all in all, it’s a pretty good foundation.  If adhered to with love and respect on both sides, perhaps it could solve many of the problems we stepfamilies face.

Stepmother’s Bill of Rights  

Our marriage is our first priority, and we will address all issues together.

I will be part of the decision-making process in my marriage and family at all times.

People outside the immediate family – including ex-wives, in-laws and adult children – cannot make plans that affect my life without my consent.

I will not be responsible for the welfare of children for whom I can set no limits.

I must be consulted about which children will live with us, when they can visit and how long they will stay.

I will not be solely responsible for housework; chores will be distributed fairly.

I will be consulted regarding all family financial matters.

Others may not violate my private space at home, nor take or use my possessions without my permission.

I will never be treated as an “outsider” in my own home.

My husband and stepchildren must treat me with respect. 

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Stop Parental Alienation–a terrible form of Child Abuse. Eight states have now officially recognized Parental Alienation Awareness Day. To learn more, go to Parental-Alienation-Awareness.com.

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One Response to “The Stepmother’s Bill of Rights”

  1. 1
    xbgo1 Says:

    Sounds OK
    Heres a few more from the Mans view

    People outside the immediate family – inc ex-husbands, womans parents and adult children cannot make plans that effect the mans life without his consent.

    The man will not be solely responsible for the family’s income, he will also not be responsible for yardwork, property repairs , car repairs or any other chore that women deem to be historically mans work.

    The man must be consulted about which relatives and friends the women wishes to stay with us. He also must be consulted about when these same people can visit and how long they stay.

    He will never be treated as an outsider in his own home, that includes if the relationship breaks down.

    Others may not violate his private space at home, nor take his possessions without his permission, this includes if the relationship breaks down.

    My new wife and her children and family must treat me with respect.

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