Comments on: Do talk shows on controlling men give dominant men a bad name?

By: jw

jw — Tue, 21 Aug 2007 07:28:07 +0000

These shows are appealing to the lowest in humanity.

That said, there is a sexist view of men as controlling beasts running through our culture. These shows use that sexism, they feed it, to line their own pockets.

By: christianj

christianj — Tue, 21 Aug 2007 02:26:24 +0000

It all reminds me of the Spin Sisters, prioritizing their journalistic pricinples..

“find the victim”, “Find the female victim”, “Which women was the victim”.

This is now what women wallow in. The Spin Sisters did their jobs very well and changed the thinking of an entire sex..

By: amfortas

amfortas — Tue, 21 Aug 2007 01:44:11 +0000

Pre-20th C there were circus shows with deformed people. Things have just got a tad more technological. These ringmistresses still make the lame hop through rings for the derision of the great unwashed. And while both Denise and Cons have points to make, the thrust of these programmes are generally very anti-male. No need to argue, folks. The treatment of people, male and female, audience members, is puerile and factitious in the main.

Denise, close your eyes. Switch them off !

By: Denise Noe

Denise Noe — Mon, 20 Aug 2007 20:18:53 +0000

conservativation said,

On balance the mere mention of controlling men via violence or whatever, and the pathology that accompanies the women subjected to it is unproductive in its mention here. I wonder if Denise thought that mentioning the weakness of the women mitigated the gender imbalance of this misandric article?

(Denise) I’m disappointed that you see my essay as misandric, conservativation. It was meant to be an essay about a possibly misandric phenomenon or a phenomenon that could contribute to misandry. I actually think most heterosexual relationships are a lot of give-and-take with the man being dominant sometimes and the woman being dominant sometimes. I think many relationships have a female who is somewhat dominant and many have a male who is somewhat dominant. I wrote this article because I am concerned the media focus on the dominant man who is extreme in his dominance may contribute to negativity toward men overall. I thought it was necessary to mention the way women appear weak and sappy not to mitigate the misandry of the piece — which I don’t think is in the essay itself — but to show how a negative stereotyping of one sex often goes hand-in-hand with a negative stereotying of the other.

By: Squiggy

Squiggy — Mon, 20 Aug 2007 19:08:41 +0000

The dominance of men who appear on these shows seems unleavened by humor, protectiveness, or even reasonableness.

Most likely these “men” and “women” are actors, and bad ones at that. These shows are for women only, and their ratings come from confirming women’s prejudices (i.e. woman good, man bad). I’ve tried explaining to my wife why I can’t stand Lifetime (they basically hate men) but she doesn’t see it. I point out to her how it’s nearly always a man who is the bad guy but she sees the one out of ten where it’s a woman causing the problems. Even then there is always a man who made her the way she is. The only good men on these shows are invariably gay.

By: conservativation

conservativation — Mon, 20 Aug 2007 16:31:12 +0000

Fear of this dynamic, the overly dominant male, I liken to for example the media over-blowing fear of Christians as a result of a kook exploding an abortion clinic. There is not a preponderance of these uber controlling men, and I’d say in the extremes (the man eating insects as above) there likely exists equal gender numbers of these wackos both ways, man to woman, woman to man.
Setting these outliers aside, the issue of control is wildly a female problem. The lack of ability to control is the hidden grounds for no-fault filings being more abundant by women.
In my experience with couples counseling (layman of course) I see not only frustration on the part of women for what they can and cannot influence in their mate, but also an utter lack of the instinct to control present in the men, generally speaking. Where men get controlling manifests in budget and jealousy or how the wife relates to other men. As far as micromanaging this is nearly an exclusive realm of female behavior.
If you accept the complexity model of brain gender differences, how women think with intertwined areas of the brain running literally every thought through every possible iteration it can explain why this happens. It would seem that men, when pondering a task simply ponder the task, be it their own task or their mate. Women however will ponder the ramifications of the task in painfully microscopic terms and then attempt to use seemingly irrelevant considerations as fodder with which to influence the undertaking.
On balance the mere mention of controlling men via violence or whatever, and the pathology that accompanies the women subjected to it is unproductive in its mention here. I wonder if Denise thought that mentioning the weakness of the women mitigated the gender imbalance of this misandric article?

By: Willis

Willis — Mon, 20 Aug 2007 14:40:56 +0000

Perhaps when faced with the temptation to engage in sexual intercourse, a person should go watch an oil rigger.
-Denise Noe

By: The Vicar

The Vicar — Mon, 20 Aug 2007 13:22:12 +0000

Could be, but then what does that say about Oprah or Dr. Phil?