I’ve often marveled at my nine-year-old daughter’s remarkable ability to spread her toys, clothes and other junk all over both the house and our yard. (The yard is no mean feat, given that we live on a one acre lot that used to be a horse ranch).
When I go into her room to tell her a bedtime story, I usually have to kick things aside to clear a path. It’s not all her fault–my wife is an extremely intelligent woman who nevertheless seems incapable of drawing the simple connection between the unnecessary things she buys our daughter during Saturday shopping and the hoards of junk she curses at as she steps over them on Monday.
I see from The Onion satire piece Child Walks Out On Toy Non-Proliferation Talks that I’m not the only dad in the world with this problem. The battle here concerns Corinne (pictured), who “refuses to reduce her stuffed-animal stockpile.” Sounds like the old disarmament talks of the Cold War era. From The Onion:
“Toy non-proliferation talks between Donna and Adam Feit and their 8-year-old daughter Corinne broke down Monday when Corinne stormed away from the kitchen and slammed her bedroom door.
“‘The Feits had hoped to walk away from the dinner-table summit with a cap on the acquisition of new toys and a workable plan for the reduction of those already in their daughter’s possession,’ said Nancy Flemming, the Feits’ neighbor and friend. ‘But after less than half an hour of talks, Corinne said she wished she was never born and stomped to her room. It was nothing short of a meltdown.’
“The long-standing toy-related conflict between the Feits and their only child came to a head last week when the Feits announced that the rate at which Corinne was amassing toys was unacceptable, and that her new habit of storing toys in the garage and living room was in direct violation of household rules. The Feits suggested the two parties ‘have a serious talk.’”
Read the full article here.
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