As Hurricane Felix drove toward the Yucatan Peninsula yesterday, there was a massive outpouring of concern in the media for the “stranded” native people of that region, the Miskito Indians.
In a highly emotional segment, CNN’s Anderson Cooper interviewed one of the desperate, vulnerable tribe members.
“Good morning. ladies and gentlemen. It is with a heavy heart that I bring the news from Central America, where Hurricane Felix is bearing down on the people of Nicaragua and Honduras at Category 5 strength. Yet beneath this looming tragedy–as if this latest struggle between man and nature brought on by President Bush’s failure to ratify the Kyoto Treaty wasn’t enough–there lurks a far more insidious story, one of rich vs. poor, have vs. have-not. Indeed, as plane after plane of Louis Vuitton-toting Americans are evacuated back to the United States and the comfort of their ozone-depleting SUVs, the indigenous Miskito Indians of Central America are left to face the wrath of Felix on their own, like a pathetic scattering of oddly-pierced human shields.”
“With me live from Honduras is Nicara Menchu, a Miskito Indian who has taken time from hurricane preparations to talk to us. Welcome, Nicara. No doubt you are currently engaged in some sort of child sacrifice to appease the Sky God, no?”
“Uh, no, Anderson. We’ve actually been watching the Weather Channel.”
“Of course you have, Nicara. Also– I want to assure you that the large metallic object with the ‘magic’ glass is in fact something we call a vid-e-o cam-er-a. It is used to take moving pictures of your plight so we can share them with others. It will not– I repeat– will not steal your soul.”
“I know what a video camera is, Anderson. I have a Masters Degree in Communications from Yale.”
“Of course you do! Boy, the white man really did a number on you, didn’t he? Speaking of which, can you tell us a little bit about how the white devil has left you behind with a hurricane about to descend on your tribal lands like a swooping falcon of death?”
“No one left us behind, Anderson. My people have lived in this area for hundreds of years. We have survived storms that dwarfed Katrina. Over time, we have adapted ways to survive them.”
“Mmm hmm. So what you are saying is that you and your noble tribesmen were literally pushed off the bus to make room for those with lighter skin.”
“No, that is not what I am saying at all. I am saying that we do not require rescue, as we are quite able to survive on our own.”
“Right. At what point did Bush’s National Guard cronies start passing out the small-pox laden blankets and firewater?”
“Uh, I’ve really got to get back to work here.”
“Absolutely. From all of us at CNN, we wish you the best. And remember, ritualistic dancing is no match for a Cat 5 Hurricane.”
“Good day, Mr. Cooper.”
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bashiklove said,
September 7, 2007 at 1:03 pm