Michelle Triola (formerly Marvin): Once burned but twice foolish?
The Michelle Triola Marvin 1977 palimony suit against star Lee Marvin appeared to exemplify two things: 1) The way so many people in contemporary American have abandoned a recorded marriage for the informality of cohabitation and 2) The inferiority of cohabitation to marriage.
Although Michelle Triola Marvin had changed her last name to that of the actor, the couple had lived together for years without marrying.
Like many other people of the era, MTM bought the argument that “marriage is a piece of paper†and believed that she didn’t need it. Of course, a birth certificate, a social security card, a driver’s license, an identification card (for those like myself who don’t drive), any kind of certificate or degree, and cash itself are also pieces of paper.
When Lee and Michelle met, he was a wealthy star and Michelle was a singer who supported herself but was far from either rich or famous. During the relationship, she abandoned singing for fulltime homemaking.
For a couple of years after their break-up, Lee Marvin sent her monthly checks of support, although he was under no legal obligation to do so. Then he decided to cut off the checks. At that point, she decided to sue for community property, arguing that it was owed to her despite the lack of a “piece of paper†since she had acted as a de facto wife. It became famous as the “palimony†lawsuit.
I recall a conversation about the case between two young men at the college I attended at the time it was making headlines. One commented, “What she’s asking for is a divorce and they never were married.†The other guy said, “There are two ways of looking at this thing. One is that it demeans the institution of marriage. But the other is that it might let these people who live together know that they’re not going to get away with anything.â€
Michelle Triola Marvin lost the case. The judge ruled that she was not entitled to community property. However, the judge ordered Lee Marvin to pay a relatively small amount to her so she could “rehabilitate†herself for the paid labor market but even that was overturned on appeal.
Michelle Triola (she would leave off the “Marvinâ€) appeared to have learned the hard way that a legal, recorded marriage is superior to cohabitation. “If a man want to leave a toothbrush at my house, he can damn well marry me,†she commented.
So what is her current living situation? She is cohabiting with actor Dick Van Dyke and has been for years! Apparently she has eaten the words quote above. I cannot help but wonder why she has not lived them instead.
Michelle and Dick – June is coming up and it’s the month for weddings!
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May 12th, 2008 at 10:13 pm
Mr. Marvin was clearly smart enough to keep the government out of his personal relationships.
Wise move.
Apparently, he saw no need to get financially raped in divorce court.
May 13th, 2008 at 7:14 am
I still contend that the major reason men marry is because they don’t understand how biased the family court system is against them. They typically enter marriage never even considering what might happen to them if a divorce were to ever occur. Then when it happens (50% of the time) they are systematically ripped limb from limb until they have lost everythning of value they ever had. Ignorance accounts for a lot of decisions people make.
May 13th, 2008 at 6:41 pm
[...] Posted By Denise Noe On May 12, 2008 @ 7:23 pm In Analysis, Culture, Entertainment, Families, Family, Feminism, Mating, Marriage & Divorce, Media, Psychology, Sex & Relationships, Sex and Metropolis, Society, Vox Populi | 2 Comments [...]
May 13th, 2008 at 9:38 pm
In a me, me, me world where the only commitment most women make is to themselves, most find that even they aren’t worth keeping their own word to.
Cohabitation is a clear expression that the parties are not even prepared to commit to a marriage, let alone to one another. This in an era where the conventional – that is to say, feminine – wisdom is that women are experts at ‘relationships’, are empaths extraordinaire and can ‘communicate’ their way through the most difficult ‘conflicts’ to achieve ‘resolution’.
In reality the only thing they are good at is ‘closure’, as in shuting the door after the man they throw out. With a bit of luck Dick Van Dyke might avoid that fate as he is getting on in years and a heart attack might get him first. Frankly it is the better attack on the heart than most women give their menfolk.