“After Sen. Barack Obama’s comments last week about what he typically eats for dinner were criticized by Sen. Hillary Clinton as being offensive to both herself and the American voters, the number of acceptable phrases presidential candidates can now say are officially down to four.
“‘At the beginning of 2007 there were 38 things candidates could mention in public that wouldn’t be considered damaging to their campaigns, but now they are mostly limited to ‘Thank you all for coming,’ and ‘God bless America,’ ABC News chief Washington correspondent George Stephanopoulos said on Sunday’s episode of This Week. ‘There would still be five phrases available to the candidates if the Obama camp hadn’t accused Clinton of saying ‘Glad to be here’ with a little tinge of sarcasm during a stump speech in North Carolina.’
“As of press time, the two additional phrases still considered appropriate for candidates are the often-quoted ‘These pancakes are great,’ and ‘Death to the infidels.’”
The Onion satirical commentary above–Number Of Acceptable Things Candidates Can Say Now Down To Four–has a lot of truth to it. On a related note, one thing I find annoying about these elections is the “likeability” factor. The candidates have to be “likeable,” “one of the people,” etc., and have to chow down with whatever constituency they’re wooing. This in an election for the top post in the most powerful empire in the history of mankind.
By contrast, one day I would like a see a candidate who tells the electorate this:
“I’m running for president because I’m the most qualified candidate. I’m not here to be your buddy. I’m not here to make you like me. I’m not here to be one of you. I’m not going to beg for votes in every greasy spoon in Iowa, and I’m not going to glad-hand you at rallies–it has nothing to do with the job for which you’re electing me.
“I’m not going to waste my time with 23 different damn debates going over the same issues over and over again–I have better things to do. I’m smarter than you and more educated than you–hell, I’m smarter and more educated than almost anybody–and that’s why you should vote for me for president.
“And if you’re looking for a friend, go get a dog.”
Now that would be a candidate I’d vote for…
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amfortas said,
I have your vote then?
Vote #1 Amfortas.
The Gnome doesn’t have to get down.
May 20, 2008 at 10:04 pm