Governments do not bestow rights. There is no right to marry, except that authorized by God. Oh, please don’t hold your nose! I realize you have a tantrum every time you hear that, “Boo hooooooo! Religious bigotry, whine, whine.” No, no. Just good old-fashioned human contempt. Catch another minnow there on your whale-head perch?

Now, a question for all the Rhodes Scholars: Why can’t I marry my mommy? She’s only been dead for a few months.

Ahhhh, yaa uh smat buy, yah!