“It’s funny about MAN’s attitude toward rape in war.”

While parsing perhaps someone could edit the spelling, typos too? smile. I went to that site and recognized it as one I visited once, old password, was there two years ago, password worked but I couldn’t add this note although I tried.

“- See, jazz always had this thing, having your own sound so all sorts of peoplewfho maybe couldn’t have made it in other arts – they’d've had their idiosyncracises ironed out like if they were writers they’d not’ve made it ’cause they couldn’t spell or puntuate or painting ’cause they couldn’t draw a straight line. Spelling and straight line stuff don’t matter necessarily in jazz, so there’s a whole bunch of guys whose stories and thoughts are not like anyone else’s who wouldn’t've had a chance to express all the ideas and shit they had inside them without jazz. Cats who in any other walk of life wouldn’t've made it as bankners and plumbers even: in jazz they could be geniuses, wihout it they’d've been nothing. Jazz can see things, draw things out of people that painting and writing don’t see. From: but beautiful, a book about Jazz by Geoff Dyer North Point Press (Might have been quoting F Monk)

Last note. Go to the Carey Roberts article on MND and see comment 5 I think… 1 in 4 women victims of DV. Women’s touch inhances, men – must be one in four, when they touch… women are harmed.

Thanks Amfortas. I really appreciate your contributions and support. I “went off” and I usually get embarassed by typos, spelling errors. You know what some readers don’t … worked the bean fields, skipped school when young, some brain damage in the army. I always feel that some head up their butt college PhD femnist will get on board and take their red pen through what I write… smile

Have a nice Thanksgiving to you and the rest of the MND crew.

I feel somewhat safe after thirty comments have been made on a thread like this while assuming that only one or two more people will still be checking in at that point. I rant, therefore I am.

PS Cancer isn’t an issue this year, ran three miles today at decent pace. Hope things stay that way.

SD

Warning, MINI-RANT ahead.

Even those who believe that a male touch defiles and a female touch turns a boy “into a man” (as if all those walking wounded males who never became men are men because they had sex with some random female? A little sexual friction by a female who “let them” get into her pants as a pathway to being a MAN) To teach boys and girls that men defile females with their male bodies while female bodies turn boys into men is to set up a belief that men will always owe women a great debt for the pleasure and purity of women’s bodies.

Even as we let women off the hook for sex crimes men would be charged with, we should learn to see that a result of that careless attitude is that, for “sensitive” boys as I was… the message that male bodies are dirty and defiling compared to female bodies isn’t a lesson any boy or girls should learn and it’s not a lesson I wanted to learn as a boy and it took me a long time, a bit of healing, to feel my body was as valuable and “giving” as that of a woman. [I think sex crimes come from boys who feel dirty, bad, and rejected] I did learn from good women later in life that they valued male bodies and male sexualtiy but I didn’t think they were teaching me to be a man, that was something I wanted to learn from men. But women who helped me see that male sexuality, for them, was a pleasure, not a chore, helped me move beyond the public perception that somehow male bodies had less value than female bodies. (I know that jogging and weight training and good clothes and good genes helped women see me in a way that some of them would not see men whose bodies looked unhealthy (the norm today) Teaching our sons and daughters to take care of their health, to dress well, to work out a bit, teaches them that their bodies have value and that their bodies are worth caring for. Most teen boys today seem to think a boys body isn’t as good as a woman’s body unless they are sports figures. Too many settle for a bag of chips and a six pack of beer and practicing a deep voice, using vulgar language, as if that gives them a certain macho sex appeal. As adult men they end up unhealthy looking, staring at/wanting beautiful women who diet, exercise, had their lips done or their boobs, 100$ hair cuts, bras that enhance, silk underwear … women’s bodies adorned with nice clothes and jewelry as if boxed up Christmas presents where, if you know the right combination (Praise and cash) those boy/men might, if they play their cards right, “get lucky” … those boy/men easily buy into putting women’s bodies on a pedestal and they see men having sex with girls a crime while women having sex with boys a gift. Few see it as the same.

Think of all the ads you see making male bodies look dorky, add all the groin kicks and stupid boy movies where a boy fucks a pie (Oh, is fucking too harsh, was I supposed to say “make love”) or where girls laugh at boys sexual organs or where boys are like a deer in the head lights because some girl complements them or slaps their butt.

Most men and women don’t know where their sexual attitudes or gender attitudes come from. They don’t see why they arrived at the point of view that men having sex with girls should be castrated or end up with a life time in jail but when women USE boys for sex they say “He got lucky” which is like most gender issues: “Women good, men bad” a common message in our culture. Few know how many mothers injure or kill how many sons compared to fathers killing sons or daughters. The assumption is that all most all violence in the home is from the man. Judging men more harshly for sex crimes or for DV, or for a divorce… it’s all parrt of a puzzle that we don’t have a full picture of yet.

A bit off topic, a mix, but sometimes it’s hard to separate gender issues and make a point.

So many lesson about gender are superficial and few think past “oh, boys must like it (sex with adult women) so, whatever” but those boys grow up to be men and they look back and realize that sex with an adult women made it seem OK for them so why not do what they learned and have sex with young females and then – opps, the jury didn’t see things the same way, so, off to jail.

I tire of the superficial views of gender that are taught in women’s studies and repeated by men and women. The old story about how men are happier in marriage is typical. Women assume women are less happy because men are jerks that just want to get laid, don’t do their fair share of house work, … they don’t consider that most men work fulltime… wives work fewer hours or fewer months or years STUCK in the work place… [Few know that the double shift is a myth and that men work at least EQUAL hours as women when work away from home and work at home is added together] He is glad to be home, she might be bored being home too much… for the guy a homelife that is a bit rocky might still be better than work. Or, consider that men who are unhappy and have low earning capacities don’t attract women, or, when they do, they often can’t keep one happy because they can’t buy enough STUFF.. women gravitate to the happy men with earning potential and stay with them… [Most men simply complain less and if asked if the are happy don't want to hurt their wives feelings or seem that they are losers so they say they are happy when maybe they have had a mild depression for years] Those single guys who couldn’t attract a woman or who ended up seen as failures because they didn’t earn enough or were not sexy enough, or were too boring… ended up single, and STILL unhappy. And women, taught to believe WOMEN GIVE MORE assume marriage must benefit men more… just like they assume a man having sex with a girl defiles her, while sex from a woman inhances a guy who “gets lucky” … I see that men have a sense of protectiveness where they won’t criticize a wife as quickly to others as she might criticize him. Critizing men is part of our culture from criticizing men as a group to husbands as individuals. From what I have seen some men are happy, or not happy by nature or because of circumstances – not enough edcuation, a crappy job… when a family isn’t doing well the man feels it’s his fault and so does his wife… if he were more of a man he would earn more, be more “manly” while a woman can be average and think she is a great mother.

Of the married men I know few seem to have wives who make them happy compared to wives who nag, or spend too much, or complain too much. Some men are happier because they have a home, a partner and friends but not because she was doing anything to make him happier that was superior to anything he did to make her happy.

From money, to sex, to rape, to crime, most Americans simply repeat feminist claims and very few of us have takent the time to read a few books by feminist and then a few books by those who disagree. Most of the women I know took a class or two from a feminist while in high school and college, they learned that some things easily proven to be false as true… and then had those male bashing ideas reinforced by a bimonthly screed from some woman who took those same classes and who ended up as a journalism major. Women’s TV and women’s advertising has the same kind of women teaching other women how to see men. Very few women ever do more research to find out if what they learned from a bigot was true in the real world… And why would they? If men were taught that they were superior, taught by other men – well who would feel a need to challenge such things. “I’m O.K. your not O.K. so go make some money and give it to me to make up for you being a jerk and me having to put up with it.” Nice place to be if you want someone to take care of you and pay the bills, to die young from working stressful jobs for decades while you are protected… but how to get rid of the guilt. Sometimes I think it’s women’s guilt when they see all the men dead from war, or work, when they see how hard men work so that they can buy shoes, – it’s tht guilt that makes them want to believe men OWE women because to accept a man’s labor you must convince yorself you have “earned it” somehow. If you are taught your gender is superior then how is it in your interest to simply prove that you are not superior, but in fact, equal? If that? Why challenge yourself when you feel you are the gender that gives and other the gender takes so you get to go to heaven? Men go along with women’s views of men as the labor tirelessly … or otherwise they would see how easily duped they were and that all that labor supporting women, women’s health, ending up in women’s banks, ending up with women getting the kids and home, damn, you better feel you don’t deserve all those things that some women took from you because if men realized how much they have given to women, and how much women are willing to take… men would rebel, riot… Whenever feminist get on MND there is always that tone that we do owe women something for out past behaviors if not the present behaviors of MOST men when MOST men work their butts off for family, for country, while taking abuse from many women believing that their gender is the dirty gender, the lazy gender, the unappealing gender… why else would we have so many women’s health centers with many more men in poor health and dying younger? Why else would we fund special programs to help women in college when there are so many women there already. Why else would we think women deserve high level military jobs while we protect women as much as possible? Why else would we watch a man work 50 hours a week until the children were a step or two past total dependency going off to school while he supporter his wife and kids and now she wants to have a separate life and she KNOWS she can get the kids, home, and his cash, simply by asking for it,and most men just take it in silence. Why else? Teach boys that men are dirty, selfish, and that they should not comlain about their lot in life and you have a serf class without chains. Like Elephants in India tied with a string, by skinny weak men … prisoners of their own fear never knowing their own strength and power, that’s how I see most men in American the last 50 years. End of rant and I guess it wasn’t a mini one at that.

The easiest prisoner to control is the one who believes he is free and acting in his own self interest.

SD

Some feminist reading this will – no doubt – assume I got ripped by a wife or two. Not true. My wife is better educated, has more money and we are happy with each other although she thinks I spend too much time fighing feminist propaganda rather than just being happy. I spent too much time working as a social worker or in police work seeing children and men get screwed by a court system that seems to work in the best interests of NOW or the AAUW rather than the best interest of the family or children. So, can’t quit until fairness is achieved.

“All men benefit from rape.” The theory is that women, repulsed by male bestiality and sexuality find it better to take up with one man as her protector than to endure the thrusting and bruises of random men. We men then become the lesser of two evils.

I wrote about this topic suggesting that when we males sit around in a fraternity discussing which “boy” must go out and rape … we tell him, ya, sure, some will want to cut your dick off, others to put you in jail or prison, but think about your buddies who will benefit, WHY ELSE would women want to be with us if not for the fear of being without a man and you get a “free” piece of ass and then women will rush to us to protect them from boys and men like you.

I also wrote that almost every guy I have ever known has said that rapist should be killed, castrated, or raped (in jai) Rape varies from the guy who found himself, after his long time sex partner climaxed telling him it was time to quite … compare that “rape” to the man that grabs a little girl… To make all “unwanted sexual acts” equal to rape … especially when you have a “He said she said” by a tramp fond of playing sex games for profit and power… to make both equal to harming a child, a stranger, is bizarre.

As I have written, if most men would kill or castrate men who rape women what more would feminist suggest was needed to prove that “men don’t benefit” or “condone” rape.

I believe feminist love to shame men and target all of us for the perversity of a few while they ignore the sexual crimes of women. Yes, sex crimes by women (when you don’t look for them or care about them you find far fewer) are rare compared to men but so are the sex crimes of men comparted to “MOST” men. If no women raped boys, or lied about rape, or used sex to “set up” a man, or profited wrongly from sexual harassment or false rape claims – then I would hang my head in shame that only my gender does such things. Having experienced sexual abuse first hand as a boy, by an adult women, having known other men who were sexually abused as boys…having seen the film Antoine Fisher, having read “Until I Find You” by Irving, having read “Guilty by Reason of Insanity, I know that many men were harmed as boys by women. It’s extremely embarassing for a man to discuss being sexually abused as a boy while his “rape” is written off as “he got lucky” or – well that was a vagina and vaginas are good… W

hen I read feminist suggesting all men benefit from rape or condone it even if they don’t do it themselves I hear, I heards as a boy, that all men are trash, all women are potential victims – well, I can only think “f*&$^ you” and your sisters who ignorantly repeat such things like brain dead parrots. Such views of men, such males bashing heard by a million boys might even cause some men to “go off” when combined with personal weaknesses, stress, losses… You don’t stop rape by bashing all boys and men.

Thanks Denise for bringing your wit and eye to this topic.

SD

SD