Victim of child support torture claims hidden bloody evidence

David A. Bardes described the torture he endured while incarcerated for child support arrears in a South Carolina jail in Tortured for child support, he didn’t owe parts one, two, three and four.

Bardes, ex-wife Betsy and teen daughter Allie describe the co-parenting lifestyle they and Allie’s brother David now enjoy in Tortured for child support arrears, he didn’t owe – part five.

Today he says that while he lay bleeding in the infirmary after a beating by deputies in the Charleston County Jail, he used his blood to write the letter “L” (his school letter) on a small piece of paper, folded it up, then hid it.

Bardes thinks authorities will try to find and destroy the paper.  He points out that it’s proof that he was bleeding while in that room.  “Then you have to ask, ‘why?,”  he says.

When asked if he’s worried it will be found before he can get to it he replied, “They’ll never find it.”

Tortured for child support arrears, he didn’t owe – part five

A lot of noncustodial parents complain about government child support collection.  Many of them have personal horror stories to go with their disdain.  None so far have topped the story of David A. Bardes.

As described in parts one, two, three and four Bardes was tortured in a South Carolina jail for child support arrears he did not owe.  Bardes spent 32 and a half hours in a hypothermic chamber jail cell.  That’s 31 and a half hours longer than international terrorists have to endure, according to Bush’s torture memo.

One question that hasn’t been answered is what about Bardes’ ex-wife?  What part did she play in this?  Betsy Bardes reluctantly agreed to a phone interview, and the result is both interesting and heartwarming.

Most of what this pair shared is similar.  Betsy says she feels guilty, but blames her attorney, who she said was rude towards her and “was out to get David.”  There are parts of the story where their realities differ.  Instead of going into detail, since it’s the the typical “he said, she said,” this part of the story is about redemption.

At one point shortly after Bardes was released from jail this couple decided to put their children first.  Who initiated this peace offering is unclear.  But what is obvious is that they are now successfully co-parenting.

“David and I were at holy war,” Betsy told me.  “And the kids were fighting all the time.”  The children weren’t getting positive guidance because the parents were spending all of their energy fighting each other.  And now?  “We function as the perfect marriage, where he lives in his house and I live in mine,” she replied, “and the kids get along great.”

David Sr. has custody of son David Jr, 15, while Betsy has custody of daughter Allie, 14.  They live four miles apart.  What makes these parents really unique is that even though they are not romantically involved, they’ve chosen not to date others.  They don’t want to burden their children with additional parent figures, at least while the children are minors.

David adds, “The laws and treatment of men are so bad (and I got hit by all of them) that I am not going to date anyone.  Any American male would have to be crazy to ever date, and God forbid, sire children with an American female.”  He adds, “Am I jaded?  Obviously yes, with good reason though.  Now what would happen if I met and fell absolutely in love with a woman?  Then, I guess, it’s all out the door. So I can’t say that I am going to remain single for life, but that is the current plan.”

Maybe what makes their co-parenting easier is that Betsy and David started their relationship and fell in love when they were just 13 and 15-years-old.  David says, “We have a lot of history together.  Yes, the kids will be off on their own in a few years, but Betsy and I will remain just as close, hang out together, travel finally.”

This family shares dinner three times a week, on average.  They even vacation together.  The accompanying photo shows the family swimming with dolphins during a recent week-long cruise to the Bahamas.

One might wonder what all of this means to the children.  Allie agreed to share her views.  “Compared to my old life, shared parenting is not just one of the best things that has happened, it is THE best thing that has ever happened to my family,” she stated.

It wasn’t easy prior to her parents’ unity.  Allie explained, “Life was so hard trying to balance things out with two parents that could not even talk to one another without arguing.  It took a toll on my brother and I for many years.”  “I was so confused.  I would ask my friends things like, ‘What is it like to wake up and have your Dad and your Mom say good morning and then go to work?,” she went on, “I have and never will know what it is like to wake up with my mother and father in the same house, married.  Divorce is a rough thing, it is unfair and unjust.”

David said, “Shared parenting is really, really good for the kids.  They thrive under it.  Both kids are healed and excelling.  Because of the sacrifices Betsy and I have made together, our kids have the next best thing to having a real mom and a real dad, we are just not under the same roof.  What we are giving our kids is their ‘childhood.’  They will grow up with the knowledge and experience of having both parents there being for them 100% of the time.”

Betsy says, “If you put all of your energy and priorities on the children, then everything works out.”  Allie, who maintains a straight A average in school adds, “I will never wake up with a mom and a dad under the same roof married.  But since the shared parenting, I can wake up with both parents having a cup of coffee and laughing like friends. I would have it no other way.”

Original article.

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Tags: Child Support & Custody, david a bardes, torture