Family Rights – Why We Must be Presumed FIT & EQUAL Parents
In 21st Century America many believe all our Civil Rights have been recognized. To mention a few: freedom of speech and religion, personal liberty, equal treatment for women and people of color. All foundations of a healthy society. But what about the security of family, the right of parents to raise and nurture their own children?
I discovered, as have many parents, that if my relationship with my child is challenged by a former spouse or even a social worker — my child and I have no right to family. A trial may occur, but there will be no jury of my peers. A lone judge will decide what’s in the “best interest” of my child.
I’ve come to believe we have a Civil Right to be presumed FIT & EQUAL parents to our children, unless you are convicted in a criminal court of being a demonstrated threat to your kids. Good, average, and poor parents are all FIT & EQUAL parents.
I welcome your thoughts on the rationale I present below to defend this statement.
Why this strong presumption? Because one foundation of morality is the supremacy of individual conscience – what many know as “let your conscience be your guide.” What more important natural obligation does any parent have than to care for their own kids? To be present in their lives in the many roles that only a parent can fill.
Reference From the Vatican web site:
http://www.vatican.va/archive/ccc_css/archive/catechism/p3s1c1a6.htm
1778. Conscience is a judgment of reason whereby the human person recognizes the moral quality of a concrete act that he is going to perform, is in the process of performing, or has already completed. In all he says and does, man is obliged to follow faithfully what he knows to be just and right….
1782. Man has the right to act in conscience and in freedom so as personally to make moral decisions. “He must not be forced to act contrary to his conscience. Nor must he be prevented from acting according to his conscience….”
A second precept says any law which stops us from acting according to a “well formed” conscience is immoral. Is it any wonder parents and children unjustly separated find it one of the most painful and disruptive experiences of their lives?
Fit parents should decide what’s in the best interest of their child. Some think a distinction should be made between good, average, and poor parents. But how can we make a single determination in a multifaceted and dynamic relationship? Like most of us I have mixed feelings about what my parents chose for me. Times I knew they made mistakes, times when I would have preferred one over the other. I saw our relationship change as I matured, but we all grew together as family through good times and bad.
Only the bad parent should be excluded, one who threatens the safety of their child with malintent. Society justly intervenes for those who seek to destroy the relationship. There would be no potential for growth. This would be a serious crime prosecuted in a criminal court.
In the vast majority of cases parents would be free to establish parenting time as they desire. While negotiating a custom schedule, a default standard would alternate physical custody on a weekly basis. Both parents would share legal custody and would alternate “tie breaker” authority on an annual basis. What would all this mean?
A single judge acting alone could not issue an order that destroys a family. The animosity and terrible waste of resources that goes into Family Court battles about which parent is “better” would be eliminated. Mediation services would be more effective when dealing with equal parents. Children would benefit from regular contact with both parents. Community resources could be better focused on identifying and prosecuting the few bad parents that exist and protecting children.
If we look through our history, the recognition of basic Civil Rights has resulted in some disruption and change — but overall they have strengthened our society. Our nation has seen an explosion of well- intentioned Family Law in the last 40 years. It is now time for a Federal Family Rights Act that will recognize and protect our ability to raise and nurture our own children.
Graduated from the Air Force Academy with a B.S. in Astronautical Engineering (1978). Was a T-37 Jet instructor pilot for several years. Left the USAF and got a Masters Degree in Computer Science from Syracuse University (1987). Married in 1987. Worked for some Defense Contractors and eventually started my own Company. My son, Domenic, was born in 1993. Went through a terrible divorce and became an activist for Family Rights. | More from John Murtari
Stumble It!
October 29th, 2009 at 3:17 pm
You don’t have to work very hard to convince me that you have the right to be a father to your own child. You’re absolutely right that the only way anyone should be able to interfere with that right, is by taking action in the criminal courts, where you are afforded all the protections guaranteed by the Constitution.
Every parent has an inalienable right to the custody of their children. The fact that we have allowed the courts to strip us of that right does not mean we no longer have that right. All it means is that it’s time to take back what’s rightfully ours. That goes for any of our inalienable rights protected from government encroachment by the Constitution.
October 29th, 2009 at 6:34 pm
AMEN!!
October 31st, 2009 at 11:57 am
Federal Family Rights Act What the hell is that ? I have never heard of such a thing , it seems hypocrital, after all isn’t it the federal government that has turned the family courts into the government sponsored kidnapping and extortion racket it now it? So How would they actually protect my rights. I would never trust them, it is all about power, money and control and protecting my rights cost them money and will eventually when the “terrorist” who run this God awful racket are brought to justice, it will be the Protectors who will end up in prison for life. It says in the bible that Satan can not remove Satan. So, I don’t buy it, the soveriegn owners of this country are going to have to be the ones that put an end to this God awful fraud and racket. The terrorist will never give up any real power and will never give up the money at all. No matter what they say and how much the pretend to respect fathers and promise to protect the rights of fathers , they will never really do it .