I was at a hardware store recently that specialized in practical (and boring) merchandise like lawn-mowers, power tools, sink handles, toilets, farm equipment, nuts/bolts, gas cans, car jacks, work clothing, and cement mix. I saw a T-shirt representing the store with a slogan that read something like: “The Man’s Shopping Mall”. This got me thinking further, and I proceeded to compare this so-called “man’s shopping mall” with the boiler-plate or garden-variety kind. And because the shirt took the liberty to divide the genders, I will assume for the sake of argument that regular shopping malls are generally female terrain (despite the obvious fact that shopping malls do carry at least a small portion of mens clothes and other such items). I will also assume for the sake of argument that the implication of the T-shirt slogan implies that men generally “enjoy” practical merchandise that benefits women and children while women generally “enjoy” merchandise that makes them feel beautiful, special, vain, clean, or pampered. My question is this: how can a place that specializes in providing merchandise to help men be more productive during the drudgery of work even be remotely considered to be as “enjoyable” as a place that specializes in the pampering of women?
Let us take a look at the difference in merchandise between the two types of “malls” and see who is really being pampered:
1.The hardware store has sturdy tool boxes for labor that also benefits women and children. The shopping mall has “chic” purses and handbags for substance and style.
2.The hardware store has hard hats to ensure productivity during the construction of society’s necessary buildings. The shopping mall has expensive hair salons for ego, style, and glamor.
3.The hardware store has nails to build houses that women also live in. The shopping mall has a nail salon.
4.The hardware store has WD-40. The shopping mall has fashionable hair spray.
5.The hardware store has hammers, screwdrivers, and wrenches for work. The shopping mall has hair dryers and curlers to help women “stand out” from the crowd of boring and ordinary men.
6.The hardware store has cover-alls to help male beasts of burden withstand the elements. The shopping mall has a Vanity, The Limited, and New York and Company for “chic” sophistication and culture.
7.The hardware store has welding and dust masks. The shopping mall has facial masks to enhance the vanity that goes along with beauty.
8.The hardware store has crow-bars for pesky nails. The shopping mall has posh snack bars.
9.The hardware store has pain killers for work-related back pain. The shopping mall has an aqua-massage for pampered indulgence.
10.The hardware store has house paint.. The shopping mall has nail polish and makeup to enhance female sex power.
11.The hardware store has carpenter pants to adorn oneself with tools. The shopping mall has expensive jewelry to adorn oneself with prestige and status.
12.The hardware store has Gojo work-ready soap. The shopping mall has a Bath and Body Works for pampered indulgence.
13.The hardware store has engine oil. The shopping mall has Oil of Olay.
14.The hardware store has work-boots. The shopping mall has high-heels, pumps, and other fashionable shoes that stroke the ego.
15.The hardware store has round tires. The shopping mall has round wedding rings for women to feel like princesses (bought and paid for by men).
16. The hardware store has flashlights for power outages. The shopping mall has scented candles for relaxation.
17. The hardware store has camping gear for “roughing it” in the rugged outdoors. The shopping mall has a plethora of creature comforts for relaxation and pleasure (including bath salts).
18. The hardware store is not kid-friendly. The shopping mall has places where a woman can spend quality time with her children.
Well, that is a short list but I think it serves its purpose. I remember seeing two bottles of bubble bath once….one geared to girls and the other geared to boys.. The girl’s one was pink and associated with being a beautiful princess. The boy’s one had a “John Deere” tractor motif. I couldn’t help but wonder if boys are socialized early to “learn” to “like” unpleasant and unsafe grunt-work so that they will become better providers and protectors of women and children at the expense of their own health and well-being. It is interesting how the items in the hardware store seemed to benefit women almost more than men by allowing men to do the “dirty work” that few women care to do in the first place.
I think men should drop the macho charade and realize that they are being manipulated into being “beasts of burden” who are tricked into doing most of society’s unpleasant, dangerous, and life-threatening labor. Just because men are somewhat bigger and stronger than females this in no way justifies the fact that males are far more likely to die in war, on the job, suicide, or from violence. How many women have enough chivalry to stop by a stranded male motorist and offer to change his tire or propose to a man with an expensive wedding ring? I suspect very few (due to restrictive cultural gender roles including princess syndrome and machismo). I suspect that men are more likely to be taught that they must “earn” their love by helping women do such unpleasant, dangerous, and boring things since the female is the proverbial “prize” to fight for.
It might behoove men to stop thinking of a female as a “prize” to be won and fought for through incessant gift-giving, heroism, risk-taking, and manual labor. If only some feminists could care more about teaching women valuable skills like auto-mechanics instead of focusing on misandrous or chivalrous issues involving getting revenge or special treatment (like the Violence Against Women Act or the seeking of softer prison sentences for women for the same crimes).
I must be clear though. I realize I am generalizing a bit in the spirit of both humor and being forthright. Obviously there is also an abundance of hard work involved in traditionally “feminine” domestic household chores like cleaning, cooking, taking care of kids, etc. And shopping malls obviously carry such domestic housewares. I am not saying women have it totally easy. But if “domestic duties” are as menial as some feminists claim, then why are so few women willing to marry down or marry house-husbands? Why do so many women lose love and respect for men when such men become unemployed and need love more than ever during such a crisis? Is housework really as dangerous and life-threatening as many male-dominated professions? Are men just disposable “meal tickets”?
All I know is that calling a hardware store a “man’s shopping mall” is like calling a sweat-shop a pleasure palace. As victims of the female-dominated spending gap, it might behoove men to take off their shackles and enter the pink zone themselves…..the shopping mall. After all, such places are essentially the bastions of female privilege. Men are not trolls who are so homely that they should be expected to buy their love from women through work, danger, machismo, and other phony acts of so-called “heroism”. Men and women have an equal right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. This means equal pain AND equal pampering. And they say “chivalry is dead” (as if it were a bad thing). I say chivalry is not dead….but it very well should be.
Sources:
Warren Farrell’s “Myth of Male Power”
Bernice Kanner’s “Pocketbook Power”
Herb Goldberg’s “Hazards of Being Male”
