Sex In The Zeros: "Greetings From Stalingrad"
March 31, 2003
by Bernard Chapin
The television program "Sex in the City" has provoked a great deal
of controversy and coverage over the last few years but I would now
like to add my own to the media morass. I speak from the position of
a man who is in the front lines of the gender war. Let me begin by saying
that the only truth in regards to the program's contents is that it
is a complete lie. To begin with, the show's producers are both admittedly
gay males and it is my belief that this program is far more indicative
of gay male sexuality than it ever will be of female sexuality. The
sad fact that so many females are able to relate to it is more a testament
to self-absorption than it is an actual reflection of life for older
women.
The characters on the HBO comedy are unlike any women in their thirties
that I've ever met. While it's true that several of the ones I've known
reflexively recite propaganda that would be in harmony with the program's
themes such as how happy they are not to be married and how they are
"not yet ready" to have children and also that they are glad to have
been free to experience the diversity (read chaos here) of their single
years. My own view is that they doth protest too much. Usually I'll
hear their vows of happiness as a reaction to my asking for a saltshaker
or the time.
These thirty-something year-old women are beginning to comprehend something
that has been hidden by the politically correct curtain that hangs across
our continent. The comprehension is that their audience is a very fickle
one and that those who once adored them are no longer willing to make
sacrifices for women who have very few reproductive years left. Some
are absolutely incredulous that their market value may be diminishing
but they've forgotten that there are very few real life princesses in
their thirties. What is forgivable in youth is abominable in middle
age. The days of the coquette are finite and we have less flattering
names for women who engage in spoiled behaviors as they age. The difference
between older and younger women has never been greater than it is today
and "Sex in the City" spins an evil lie to obscure this truth.
Males have always, and will always, prefer younger and more fertile
females to older ones and the pursuit of fertility is a noble (not shallow)
reason for why we select the women that we do. Today, an astronomical
number of women waste twenty years or more of their fleeting fertility
before realizing that lost time cannot be regained. They then hope that
the females younger than them are as short-sighted as they are. Predictably,
based on the illusions our culture has fostered, they probably will
be.
Last year's publication of Sylvia Ann Hewlett's book, Creating a Life: Professional Women and the Quest for Children,
informed us of the inherent confusion in many single females who have
been duped by pop culture and the media into believing that fertility
begins to decline at age 40. Alas, the real age for females is 27. The
fact that there is a zero point for female reproduction that no medical
technology can alter also comes as a great surprise to them. The solution
is an obvious one and it is for women to negotiate from a position of
strength and find a marriage partner when they are atop the mountain
rather than on the tortuous, weary descent to its base. This recommendation
is so obvious it shouldn't even warrant an essay but the harridans who
terrorize anyone who interferes with the fantasy lives of uncommitted
females have made the issuance of such advice a radical act of war.
Across the board most of what is labeled as advice for females are
fabrications based on the denial of human nature. Women are told that
males use younger women for sex. We do not. We marry younger women.
It is older women we use for sex. The sooner we acknowledge these unpleasant
facts the better it is for all concerned. It is the lie about humanity's
internal motivations that are the root of the strife between men and
women in our culture today. The female acquisition of high status males
as mates is based on their degree of sexual power and this sexual power
declines as they age. Danielle Crittenden's book What Our Mothers Didn't Tell Us: Why Happiness Eludes the
Modern Woman documents this outcome beautifully. This change
is power causes feelings of bitterness towards men and also towards
other women. My initial response to this was "You were the Generals
and you lost the battle so blame yourselves" but such a response is
illustrative that I, nor most males, had a great deal of attractive
power at age 20. We are decidedly low status when in college and I,
myself, was no exception. For women it is a different rule of existence
altogether.
The 20-year-old female is like the German Panzer of 1941 as it rolls
triumphantly through the Russian steppes. Everyone and everything bows
before its tread. She is pursued by every known heterosexual demographic
of male and it must, from this over-stimulation along with youth and
inexperience, make it highly difficult to make a rational decision about
the future. What is essential for her to realize is that time affects
the flesh of everyone and that she is no exception. All physical states
are temporary. By the time she reaches 35 that same elite German Panzer
has turned into a wasted carcass on the Kursk battlefield. It can be
seen belching black smoke into the Russian night from 10 miles away
(or perhaps therapeutically buying 400 dollar shoes at a New York boutique).
History is prelude and younger women presently pay no attention to the
mistakes of their elders. Possibly they imagine that the plot will change
for them even though it has never changed before and never will. If
younger females were aware of the storm that is coming they could readily
secure a high status male while were at the top of the hierarchy yet
all too many are taught in school that hierarchies do not even exist.
Besides, the allures of a meaningless existence are too great for most
to resist.
The embrace of empty affairs only grinds their bones and their prospects
to dust even if it provides momentary gratification (and I'm not sure
it even does that). The most deleterious result of all is that the modern
female's rampant promiscuity is the principal causation for the male's
decreasing desire to marry them. Women who are promiscuous have little
to offer males outside of 15 minutes of enjoyment and, the 15 minutes
is not worth the risks to one's health. A feminist anthropologist argued
that there may be a biological basis behind female promiscuity as sleeping
with numerous men allows women to find numerous men to support her offspring.
Is she right? No! This belief is wholly misguided. It only allows
for numerous men to never trust her with a dollar fifty. Sleeping with
a gaggle of men would have ensured little support from the community
as a woman who is communal is beyond individual interest. This anthropologist
ignores the ironclad evolutionary maxim "Mommy's baby, daddy's maybe"
and this is the driving force behind much of the male's reproductive
behaviors. This pithy saying encompasses male's innate concerns about
finding a reliable, non-promiscuous, spouse. After all, a woman is always
confident of her maternity whereas a man can never be 100% sure that
he is the father of his own offspring. Hence the most pleasant words
for any father to hear are "the baby looks just like you." Marriage
for the majority of our species' history provided a clear benefit to
both parties. A man would be granted sexual relations with a woman and
also be provided with progeny in the form of his children. A woman would
be given a protector and a provider to ensure that she and her children
were taken care of as she aged. Female promiscuity has destroyed the
bonds that tie men to women. The progress of the "progressive" forces
of the sexual revolution have caused the sexes to now be genuinely suspicious
of one another and, for a great many members of male the population,
compels us to not "tie the knot" at all.
It is to a man's great detriment to spend any time or money on a woman
who "throws it around." As I have a character in my book, NAPALM
is the Scent of Justice, argue:
"Any man will drive down the road in a car with 300,000
miles on it but only an insane fool would purchase one."
Insane indeed but our society encourages us to do it anyway even though
it is against all of our evolutionary interests. Societal stigma is the
only way to combat this problem and it won't be coming from a generation
weaned on "Elimidate" and MTV. The show "The Bachelorette" supplies a
convincing argument for how television really is divorced from reality.
Women may well be genuinely attracted to Lotharios but males instinctively
recoil from female players as it is a guarantor of false paternity. "The
Bachelorette" featured one female with 25 men to choose from and when
we 25 men are with a female we think "gangbang" before "marriage." Women
get cues from other women and a man who is often seen in the company of
various females becomes a hot prospect. Rather than get cues from other
men we get nauseous from their group presence. The sexes are different
and let's embrace
viva la difference once again.
James Joyce's stupendous work, Ulysses, postulates that "love" is the word known
to all men (let's say humanity here for the sake of universality). Love
is our goal and our priority. In this pursuit sex alone is a false god.
Sex is always a means and never an end. Those people that do not learn
this truth are among some of the most maladjusted in our society. Purposeless
sex is the greatest barrier to the love we can experience. The female
aping of the male's bad habits is an allure to no one. Those females
who promote themselves as commodities for sexual thrills, who become
alcoholics, smoke cigars or talk like street hustlers are by definition
not worthy of romantic pursuit. Part of the male love for woman comes
from a desire to protect and if the person you wish to protect does
not take their existence seriously or repeatedly tells you "that they
don't need your protection" then exerting yourself in their defense
is a lost cause.
The modern woman, through the mechanism of the sexual revolution, has
been indoctrinated to believe that the mindless pursuit of copulation
is the road to enlightenment. It is practically impossible for those
females born to a poor family structure, immersion in pop culture and
indoctrination by the modern leftist professorate to resist the asinine
logic of living life in the present at all times. Many of today's women
have been charmed by social engineers who are, in reality, pipers of
death. The realization that they've been had often occurs when they
are past reproductive age and it is too late to do anything about their
situation. The use of denial as a shield has been tried repeatedly.
The most hilarious of arguments foisted onto the backs of our citizens
is that somehow work is a replacement for children. Can you imagine
how the first person who made this argument was received? He or she
provoked smirks and queer looks but that's ancient history as today
such a belief is a societal convention. Women have been thoroughly deceived
on this point. Ann Coulter had an excellent quote about this in her
book Slander: Liberal Lies About the American Right
that men have jobs and that women have careers. A career has mythical
powers associated with the word. A career is satisfaction beyond pay
and it is, 95% of the time, a myth. People work to get paid. I, nor
nobody else I know, would get up at 5:15 am everyday if we weren't getting
paid to do so. I know a girl who quit an 80,000 dollar a year job and
went back to school to become a teacher because she wasn't "feeling
good about going to work everyday." I told her she had 80,000 reasons
to feel good going to work everyday.
My arguments here are not belied by the fact that I am a thoroughly
modern man (indeed as are most of the men I associate with) who has
no desire to turn back the clock to a time when women had no choices.
I believe in equal pay for equal work and hiring based on merit alone
without demographic issues as a consideration. Certainly women who want
to work themselves to death should be allowed to do so (it's good for
the economy) but why don't we be honest with them about the risks. I
mean how high functioning does a person have to be to understand that
spending time with your first degree biological relations is superior
to spending days with the neo-strangers at work you couldn't care less
about. The majority of jobs consist of producing goods that are valuable
to others and not to your self. So what? You get paid for what you do
and should be grateful for it. My friends in sales get little satisfaction
internally from what they do but live well and prosper anyway. I am
confounded by anyone choosing associates over their own blood but everyone
else should be as well.
As a male there is practically nothing that I can do about all of this
as I will forever be part of the "demand" side of the equation. Our
dilemma in dating modern women is very much like walking into a voting
booth and reading only one name on the ballot with the word "yes" next
to it and no room for the response of "no." My recommendation is to
mar the ballot with a crimson "Nyet" and walk out of the booth. "Sex
in the City" is a perfect example of the sexual revolutionist's fantasies
and it is also indicative of how today we avoid virtue at all costs.
It is a time capsule showcasing a city but the city is not New York.
It is the razed and pulverized Stalingrad of 1943.
Bernard Chapin