| MND COMMENTARY |
Dowd’s Your Daddy by Bernard Chapin
I’d like to blame Dowd for this nasty hit-woman piece, but the blame should actually be placed on Arnold for foolishly trusting a viper with The New York Lies in the first place. What was he thinking about? Arnie consenting to an interview with Dowd would be like, I don’t know, her doing an interview with me. She’s way too smart for that but why isn’t Schwarzenegger? If only Arnold read mensnewsdaily.com. Had he been more familiar with us he would have avoided the whole calamity. Anyway, “caveat emptor” would be a nice phrase for the Austrian Oak to learn right quick. She takes the poor sap out to dinner where his humiliation begins (I suppose being seen in public with her is humiliation enough though). Dowd uses the background to the interview as a way to slam Howard Stern and his “‘adolescent male humor.’” I can’t do much to defend Stern here but I will say that, unlike Dowd, he is often funny which puts him on a whole higher level of existence. Later, in this paragraph, we see just how vilely partisan Miss Dowd is: The other candidates have ganged up on the ex-bodybuilder and kicked sand in his face. The governor doesn't bother to put up much of a defense of his record. Instead, he paints himself as another victim of the right wing that snatched Florida and impeached Bill Clinton. But even as he denounces those who would have impeached Mr. Clinton over his peccadilloes, his supporters have not hesitated to spread gossip about Mr. Schwarzenegger's racy past. Notice how she writes, “right wing that snatched Florida” even though three independent recounts proved that Bush won the election. Even the left leaning Miami Herald supported this conclusion. Remember that our heavily Lancomed derelict works at “The paper of record” and you should think of this every time that she tells a gross political distortion. Her affiliation with a major paper means that we should expect some level of reality testing from her, but, as readers of this two minute mock can attest to, irrationality is forever on a first name basis with Miss Dowd. She then describes Clinton’s obstruction of justices as “his peccadilloes.” It seems that the left never stops pretending that people on the right are terrified of sexuality and then, after saying something like this about Clinton, one of their most infamous operatives suddenly discounts Arnold because of his “racy past.” I guess anything’s okay to bring up if it somehow helps leftward political machinations. What doesn’t Dowd and her crew get? Unlike Clinton, Arnold was single at the time of his wild behavior. He also wasn’t a publicly elected official. Sorry Maureen, but all of these points matter, and Arnold, unlike Bill the Swill, never perjured himself or obstructed justice. Dealing with the left is like hunting a squid; just when you have them cornered you end up with a face full of ink. As is always the case, today’s ink consists of a morass of deconstructions and blather. Dowd also mentions an incident where the “Woman As Savior” motif is played out yet one more time. She does this as a way to discredit Arnold with any shallow, Califorinian, flibbertigibbets who may be reading her column [I’m sure there are many]. Notice how Dowd pretends to have sympathy for Arnold in this quotation. However, if she had any sympathy for Arnold she wouldn’t have included the accusation in the first place. Here are the words of our whiney antagonist: At a press conference in South Central the other night, an overwrought woman from a TV station pressed him on a quote he gave while promoting ‘Terminator 3,’ about how cool it was to push the female Terminator's face into a toilet bowl. It was impossible not to feel sorry for the guy, as he explained once more: ‘She was a machine. She wasn't a woman. She was a machine. Do you get it? I love women. Trust me.’ Sadly, they have Arnold right where they want him in this story. For many people, when someone begs you believe something–like Arnold does when he protests, “I love women”– you instinctively doubt them. Why did he even bother returning the reporter’s serve on this question? The questioner, not the question, is what really needs to be analyzed. I wish he had the guts and the knowledge to see this accusation for what it really is and refute it word for word. The real issue this question highlights in that in the United States women play the lords and men play the serfs. We are their assistants in the greater scheme of things. Things are so biased that if a man treats a woman badly in a film that makes him a de facto enemy of the state. Of course, in the real world, there are women who are diabolical who must be imprisoned and arrested, but you’d never know that listening to the media. No, to kill a woman in a film is a pathological situation and the referencing of female serial killers will not exculpate one who commits this imaginary act. If he had, as an actor, murdered an actual flesh and blood female character, then what? Who cares? Is this hysterical questioner trying to claim that there are no evil women in the world who need to be dealt with? I’m sure she was and that’s why we should bring this bogus question to the public’s attention. Regardless, Arnold was right independent of sex, the character in the film was a machine and there is nothing wrong with terminating a terminator, but guess what? No one’s going to listen to him. All they hear is his pathetic plea that he loves women. I recall the star, Aaron Eckhardt, of the film, “In the Company of Men,” reporting that women used to come up to him on the street to yell at him about what acts he committed in the movie. He’d shake his head and try to explain that he is an actor who plays roles onscreen but it fell on blocked ears. Well, my reader, do you see what happens when you’re a kind, sensitive guy like Arnold? You get squashed. Everybody turns on you anyway because you’re a MAN. It doesn’t matter how much you apologize for it. They’ll still condemn you. That being said, you might as well join guys like me and apologize for nothing you haven’t done. Contest every insult or derogatory comment that comes your way about your fellow men. It’s the only way to sleep with yourself at night. I suggest Arnold follows our lead and quit trying to accommodate the Cruellas of the world like Maureen Dowd. Bernard Chapin is a writer in Chicago. |
There
is no more automatic target for Maureen Dowd than a famous, masculine
bodybuilder and former Mr. Olympia. We witness this truth in today’s
|
|