Michael Moore’s new movie, Fahrenheit 9/11, debuted in theatres this weekend. The media is going nuts over it, babbling about how “brilliant” it is. When I came home from it this Friday night, one of my roommates informed me that everyone on TV was giving rave reviews of the movie. It’s “brilliant,” I suppose, if you are so stupid that typical, mindless rants about corporate greed, oil interests, and the usual accusations of racism have an effect on you.

Moore’s intended goal is to produce the first movie to defeat an elected President. According to the New York Times, Moore says that focus groups, consisting of undecided voters, saw the movie and came out rip-roaring ready to defeat Bush.

There is just one problem with that: undecided voters probably aren’t going to see the movie. At the showing I went to, the audience consisted mostly of dorky looking professor types, typical pierced-in-every-body-part leftists with “Kerry for President” T-shirts on, and other radical looking activists.

This movie is marketed to hardcore, militant leftists, and only them. The movie was not meant to convert the undecided masses but to energize a base: a base of leftists. But this should still sober rational Americans. It used to be commonly known that there was a conservative base in America that did not need to be convinced, only energized, in order for a conservative to win an election. That no longer holds true, seeing as after eight years of Clinton that base should have been as energized as ever, and President Bush did not win in a landslide. That this movie is out to rally and energize the masses, the liberal masses, provides a really bleak picture of what America is turning into.

The movie begins with some nonsense about Bush taking vacation during the first eight months of his Presidency, and some other nonsense that he supposedly stole the election. No real proof is given for this, except that Bush had “good connections” in Florida.

The heart of the movie, however, begins when Moore introduces highly emotional footage from 9-11. He lets the screen go black – not letting you see the actual terrorists that flew planes into buildings – and uses sound to show the World Trade Center attack. Then he shows people of all types – black, white, young, old – watching the buildings collapse, in tears, shock and absolute despair over what happened. Any human being who sees this, forced to relive 9-11, will be in tears.

For most normal people, the rational and logical reaction to seeing this footage is to condemn the culture of death that Islamic terrorists live in, which produces people capable of flying planes into buildings and killing 3000+ civilians. But not Michael Moore. He shows this emotional footage, then immediately begins Bush-bashing.

What follows next, after complaining that some from the bin Laden family rode on a plane and flew out of America without being stopped and questioned by the U.S. government, is a painfully forced attempt to connect President Bush to the bin Laden family. Not to bin Laden. To the bin Laden family. Bin Laden is considered a black sheep in his family, so this connection is really pointless – unless you are of the racist and tribal belief that because you are related to someone, you share their moral guilt. But, even so, Moore assures us that bin Laden is really tied to his family. His proof: a guy on film said that at bin Laden’s son’s wedding, a “few family members showed up.” Bin Laden’s father fathered 50 children alone. A few relatives showing up at – not bin Laden’s – but bin Laden’s son’s wedding is pathetic at best.

Moore then shows a piece of paper, Bush’s military records, which shows that Bush and a man named James Bath both failed to show up for a medical exam. The name was blacked out on the copy that the Bush administration released to the press. You see; their names were on the same paper, right next to each other even. Moore then explains the connection: Bush received money from Bath and Bath received money from the bin Laden family. Not from bin Laden. From the bin Laden family. Not that Bush received the money. But that a guy he knew did. And, remember, their names were on the same piece of paper! See the connection?

Moore also uses an utterly racist (along with the typical, “The Bush family gets money from the Saudis so therefore he must be loyal to him”) argument in trying to prove a Bush-terrorist link. Moore points out that 15 of the 19 terrorists were Saudis, and also that Bush visited with the Saudi royal family after 9-11. Therefore, you see, Bush is completely responsible for 9-11.

I don’t want to have to remind leftists about the problem of racism – it just feels like they should already know (well, ok, no it doesn’t) – but just because some of the terrorists on the flight were Saudis doesn’t mean all Saudis are terrorists. Maybe some Saudis are; maybe some aren’t; or maybe all of them are. But you still need proof. The only proof offered in the movie of why a Saudi is inherently guilty of terrorism is that 15 of the 19 hijackers were also Saudis. We’ve heard repeatedly from the left that we cannot blame all Muslims for 9-11, and 19 of the 19 hijackers were Muslim. So why does Michael Moore get the liberty to label all Saudis as terrorists, and smear George Bush for talking to a Saudi?

Not to be overlooked, the war on Iraq in Propaganda 9-11 is treated in typical liberal fashion: by immediately mentioning the innocent civilians killed in wartime. In fact, the footage of this part begins by showing happy go-lucky Iraqi children playing at a playground. Then the big bad US comes in and demolishes this happy go-lucky life the Iraqis had.

A more accurate scene would have been Saddam gassing the Iraqi children. Only in the mutant, never-never land known as Michael Moore’s head would one ever think that a fun day at the park was normal life for Iraqis.

Then, to be sure to put his dagger into American soldiers, after keeping the images of the dead Iraqi civilians in the audience’s heads, he goes to interviewing American soldiers about how they prepare for war. Some of the men talked about how they listened to, “The Roof is on Fire,” as they drove tanks and invaded Iraq. By comparing the two images of the dead and homeless civilian Iraqis and the comments of the American soldiers, clearly you are supposed to think that our soldiers were attacking the people of Iraq, gleefully listening to “The Roof is on Fire,” instead of attacking a regime that tortures and murders its own people.

The rest of the movie is just typical propaganda, through the selective eye of the propaganda artist, Michael Moore. Of course, it is only through emotionally provocative images and illogical connections that the left can win. You could probably play a game to see how many logical holes his movie has, so I won’t sit here and continue to list them all. His proof is as lame and distorted as ever. For instance, at one point he shows that only one patrolman patrols a park in Oregon. Another man announces that there are only eight troopers working at any given time in Oregon. Moore then mocks the Patriot Act, which disallows breast milk on the airplane but supposedly allows Oregon to go almost completely unsecured. But troopers are not the same thing as policemen. Troopers guard public parks. Eight troopers sounds about adequate, considering how much tourism is likely in Oregon, which is also, apparently, a hot spot for terrorism in need of more policeman/troopers/whatever-they-are.

It amazes me that there are people in this world who believe that, “George Bush is a bigger asshole than Osama bin Laden,” which was what a man Moore interviewed in his movie said. This was the entire point of the movie: to put blame on Bush, not any terrorist – all of whom he purposely hid throughout the movie – for the largest attack on American soil. Leftists like Michael Moore are sick, and there is no way this movie is marketed to anyone but radical leftists, who are the only people stupid enough to like this movie.

The movie may have appeal to radical leftists and other nutcases, but anyone who can actually think will be able to point out the major and gaping logical contradictions of Fahrenheit 9/11. I left the movie feeling more pride than I ever have for our troops, who are quite simply on the right side of things, unlike Michael Moore, and our President, who has led this country greatly during these difficult times. I am fully confident that President Bush will win re-election this November, and vultures like Moore will be forced back to whatever dungeon or cave they came crawling out of.

Amber Pawlik