Author Archive

Only Their Prostitutes Know for Sure!

Wednesday, March 12th, 2008
Only Their Prostitutes Know for Sure!

POLITICAL SATIRE Nobody’s Opinion: It’s certainly a good thing we have the breaking news of another hypocritical, sex crazed, corrupting New York politician scandal on TV today. By wisely resigning his governorship, Eliot Spitzer…well, let’s just say, instead of being prosecuted as he should be, will go on to work in a wonderful corporate job,... »

Posted in Politics, Vox Populi | 7 Comments »

Tithing With Bubba, or Go Ahead—Take My Change

Friday, March 7th, 2008
Tithing With Bubba, or Go Ahead—Take My Change

Nobody’s Opinion: One of my favorite stories of Jesus is the morning he gave his famous “sermon” on the mound speech. I love that speech. And what’s particularly special about it, is that it was free to the public. Imagine…one of the most spectacular lectures ever given on earth, and it was free! Jesus was... »

Posted in Vox Populi | 1 Comment »

You Have Two Cows…

Thursday, March 6th, 2008
You Have Two Cows…

Nobody’s Flash of the day: This is going around the “e-mails.” Maybe you’ve seen it, maybe not. There is no claim to authorship on it, so because I have no idea who wrote it, I can’t tell you. Nevertheless…enjoy.   HOW THE WORLD OF POLITICS WORKS; DEMOCRATIC: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none.... »

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Posted in Vox Populi | 6 Comments »

Nobody Reports on a Presidential Monday: “Houston, We Have a Problem

Monday, February 18th, 2008
Nobody Reports on a Presidential Monday: “Houston, We Have a Problem

Nobody’s Opinion: Boy do we. We have a bunch of space cadets walking around down here looking for a port. The port used to be the United States of America, but many of us can’t find it. Where in the nebula did it go?“Roger, Roger…come in …Houston, can you read me?” Down here on earth,... »

Posted in Vox Populi | 1 Comment »

Paris Hilton & Hillary Clinton: Heiress Philosophy 101

Sunday, November 4th, 2007
Paris Hilton & Hillary Clinton: Heiress Philosophy 101

Nobody’s Opinion: Not many people know that Paris Hilton and Hillary Clinton have a lot in common. In fact, I would have never thought of comparing the two if I had not read Paris’s book, Confessions of an Heiress. Yes, Heiress Paris’s philosophy on life is so much like Heiress Hillary’s, that it’s hard... »

Posted in Vox Populi | 2 Comments »

The Expendable American Paper Cup Patent System

Friday, November 2nd, 2007
The Expendable American Paper Cup Patent System

Nobody’s Opinion: While everyone is talking about Hillary and the ever boring contest of multiple billionaires running for the office of “President of Multinational Billionaires” in order to represent all their fellow billionaires friends of the New World Multinational Corporations—everyone in the press but a brave few are ignoring the two final nails of... »

Posted in Vox Populi | No Comments »

Heather McCartney: Poster Woman for MND

Thursday, November 1st, 2007
Heather McCartney: Poster Woman for MND

Nobody Flashes Anymore: If there ever was a woman who walked the earth just begging to be the poster child for MND (Who should consider putting her "Wanted" poster up for crimes against mankind) it should be Heather McCartney. Matt Laurer could barely get in his words today on his morning show because she... »

Posted in Vox Populi | No Comments »

Want Some Candy, Little Boy?

Wednesday, October 31st, 2007
Want Some Candy, Little Boy?

Nobody’s Opinion; I don’t get it. For the last ten years I have been wearing my favorite mask, I like to call the it the “Old Hag,” and none of the kids in the neighborhood come to my house for candy…not one. I can’t figure it out. And every year I buy candy, only to... »

Posted in Vox Populi | No Comments »

Hillary’s Hard Lesson

Tuesday, October 30th, 2007
Hillary’s Hard Lesson

Nobody Flashes Anymore: Many parents today all over America are suffering anxiety attacks, due to the new policies being implemented in all our public schools. Because our Federal Government, does not trust the American parent to properly raise their own child, they are now giving out condoms, and birth control to eleven-year-olds. Planned Parenthood is... »

Posted in Vox Populi | No Comments »

Nobody’s Absurdities, No. 56-Nobody Thinks in A.D.D.

Monday, October 29th, 2007
Nobody’s Absurdities, No. 56-Nobody Thinks in A.D.D.

Nobody's Opinion; Last week, my brain was mottled in a motley mess of what many would call—ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) misrule. When I tried to focus on one news story, I would turn the page, or just sit down, and there would be another observation in my mounting collection of ADD absurdities. In fact,... »

Posted in Vox Populi | No Comments »

Nobody Likes Watson’s I.Q. Test

Friday, October 26th, 2007
Nobody Likes Watson’s I.Q. Test

Nobody’s Opinion: Last week, James Watson, the Nobel-prize winner for his work on DNA made this statement: “I am white and therefore genetically superior.” No, that’s not what he said—actually he said he was “inherently gloomy about the prospect of Africa because all our social policies are based on the fact that their intelligence is the... »

Posted in Vox Populi | No Comments »

No Wonder We Can’t Find bin Laden!

Thursday, October 25th, 2007
No Wonder We Can’t Find bin Laden!

Nobody Flashes: Today, President George W. Bush, went to view the damage done by the fires in California, using the same binoculars that he uses when he is trying to find bin Laden. "Hey, I think I see him!" Some of us will miss that famous sense of humor of his. Nobody's Perfect: Rudy Giuliani, who... »

Posted in Vox Populi | No Comments »

Evacuating Nobody Opinions of Fire

Wednesday, October 24th, 2007

Nobody’s Opinion: Did you ever wake up on the right side of the bed, only to wish for the good old days when you woke up on the wrong side? The headlines today said, “Biggest Evacuation in American History”. Over one million people, grabbing their horses, doggies, kids, spouses, pictures, and pup tents, are scrambling... »

Posted in Vox Populi | No Comments »

Who Wants Rome To Burn?

Tuesday, October 23rd, 2007
Who Wants Rome To Burn?

Nobody's Flashes: Okay…the one question that is on every man or women that still has any sort of intelligence is: Who is starting these fires? Let's face it, the Santa Ana winds have been around for quite some time now, and as we watch most of southern California go up in flames…the news reporters, do... »

Posted in Vox Populi | No Comments »

The “Sex” Factor

Monday, October 22nd, 2007
The “Sex” Factor

Nobody's Opinion; Walk into any room, stand very still, and yell the word “sex!” out loud, and everyone in the room will turn at you, and stare. They might even laugh. Now, walk into any room and yell the word “fire!” You might get the same reaction. People will search around for smoke, maybe... »

Posted in Vox Populi | No Comments »

Liberal Lawyer to Defend Savage Nation

Tuesday, August 14th, 2007
Liberal Lawyer to Defend Savage Nation

Nobody’s Perfect: It seems, once again…Michael Savage has gotten the elite’s communista’s angry again. The very thing that endears him to his listeners—that monolithic frankness, the screaming tirades against liberalism, the politically incorrect memorable quotes, just seem to blurt out of him like a fizzed-up bottle of pop. He just can’t help himself—which is... »

Posted in Vox Populi | 3 Comments »

Che Guevara Is Dead-Get Over It

Monday, August 13th, 2007
Che Guevara Is Dead-Get Over It

Nobody’s Opinion: Yesterday, while taking a walk through a local mall, I noticed something that was quite disturbing, in a déjà vu sort of way. Che Guevara’s tee-shirts seemed to be in way too many store windows for my patriotic liking, along with Al Pacino’s Scar face character… “Say hello to my little friend.” These... »

Posted in Vox Populi | 7 Comments »

Cruising to Kennebunkport

Sunday, August 12th, 2007
Cruising to Kennebunkport

Nobody's Opinion: Okay. What's with all the boat trips to Kennebunkport? And why don't they take this man's license away? As you can see here: George Senior is just a little too boat happy. And it seems his son takes after him. But heck, I guess if your an x-President and want to ram a boat into... »

Posted in Vox Populi | 5 Comments »

Brain Defibrillations

Friday, August 10th, 2007
Brain Defibrillations

Nobody’s Opinion: Okay, I’m in a funk right now. Politics has got me crazy. I’m starting to walk around in a daze, tripping over old dog bones, wondering when the actual question of, “How many angels can fit on the end of a pin?” will get around to being discussed under EG’s columns,... »

Posted in Vox Populi | 1 Comment »

Would You Do This?

Thursday, August 9th, 2007
Would You Do This?

Nobody Knows; The cell phone is becoming such a part of our culture, that young men, especially the evocative ones who work at various Star Bucks, have thought up the answer to the ever growing problem of not losing their cell phone. Just carry it in your earlobe. Sexy. Of course, answering the phone is... »

Posted in Vox Populi | 3 Comments »

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