If Women Were Happy

by Marc H. Rudov

Women are the unhappiest mammals on Planet Earth. How else could one explain labiaplasty? Facelifts, tummy tucks, boobjobs, eyejobs, cheek implants, liposuction, collagenized lips. Now, they’re reshaping and reducing their labia?!?!? Is there one part of a woman’s anatomy that she actually accepts or likes? Too bad James Watt didn’t invent the esteem engine. Women would be breaking down the doors to buy it.

How frequently must I hear from women that they prefer the company of men because their female friends endlessly whine and complain? How often must I hear that legions of girls who, in 2006, attend college only to obtain MRS degrees and snag men to take care of them? I’m not kidding. In fact, it’s worse than that. Recently, while a guest on a talkshow in Charlotte, NC, a 22-year-old college girl called me on the air to admit that many of her girlfriends are engaged in trading sex for car payments and clothes from their male classmates. Wow! Female unhappiness abounds. When women disrespect other women, I know there’s a problem. Men don’t speak this way about each other.

Glance at the headlines of the leading women’s magazines in the supermarket checkout lane. How many of them presume women to be happy? Zero. Why? Because they know women were socialized to be miserable. Allow me to paraphrase a great quote of Benjamin Franklin by placing him in a modern-day romantic scenario in which his woman incessantly complains. After reaching his limit one day, Ben turns to her, saying: "Baby, the Declaration of Independence only guarantees you the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself!" What a concept.

If fathers—and mothers—would only speak Franklin's words to their young daughters, dating and marriage could become healthy, enjoyable endeavors. Unfortunately, that is not what happens. The typical father, especially the divorced father, assuages his awkwardness with female double standards by overcompensating through underparenting. He thinks that acceding to every one of his daughter's whims, demands, and tantrums is a sign of love. It isn’t. He is doing her and himself a huge disservice. Now, multiply this by millions of cases.

When dealing with rebellious daughters, way too many fathers cave, defer, coddle, and spoil. Result? An entire generation of immature women untrained to know happiness, ill-equipped to be independent adults—let alone girlfriends and spouses. A woman raised this way doesn't grasp that SHE is responsible for her own happiness. She doesn’t realize that happiness is a choice, that happiness is self-made—a byproduct of achievement, not a goal itself, not a present somebody else can give her, not a new item she can buy on sale at Victoria’s Secret.

Will a woman in constant search of happiness ever find a man who can please her? No. Will she ever experience true intimacy? No. Will she ever find enough clothes to make her happy? No. Will she ever be able to have enough plastic surgeries to quell her insecurities? No. In fact, she’ll never be happy.

Just as a woman, like a man, cannot become physically fit until she comprehends the rules of fitness and assumes full responsibility for her fitness—meaning she must acquire it for and by herself—she cannot become happy until she comprehends the rules of happiness and assumes full responsibility for her own happiness.

Let’s say that every woman on Planet Earth reads this article, agrees with me, and decides instantaneously to become happy. What would our life be like? Below, I have listed 10 signs that our world is populated with happy women.

Ten Signs Happy Women Populate Planet Earth

1. Divorce rate plummets to 10%; custody fights are relics of the past


2. Most women's magazines cease operations


3. Women publicly praise men and fatherhood


4. Marriage rate increases to 90%


5. Divorce courts treat men and women equally


6. Unmarried pregnant women who unilaterally choose to give birth are solely responsible for supporting their children, ending paternity suits


7. Men respect women and no longer wine & dine or objectify them


8. Plastic surgery is a marginal industry


9. National Organization for Women (NOW), whose victimhood propaganda now falls on deaf ears, is extinct


10. Congress scraps the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA), and all states remove anti-male biases in domestic-violence laws

Parting Comments

Our culture imbues us with female double standards—allowing women to be equal in the workplace and privileged outside of it—which most people find tough to overcome. Why else would men still wine & dine women, despite the custom being outmoded and demeaning? It is ingrained thinking, which I think of as “social gravity.” When astronauts experience an absence of Earth’s gravity, they modify their basic behaviors. Accordingly, the absence of social gravity will force men and women to modify their basic behaviors, too.

So, for women to attain real happiness, and, consequently, harmony with men, they must operate absent the double-standard social gravity that perpetuates generations of miserable women and destroys mutually satisfying romance. Based on my experience, I doubt that happy women ever will populate Planet Earth to the extent I’d like to see. But, I can say this: If women were happy, men would be happier to spend more time with them. Guaranteed.

Here are my three suggestions to ending female unhappiness:

1. Parents—especially fathers—must train their daughters that only through personal achievement will they find happiness
   

2. Adult women previously raised with attitudes of entitlement, expecting happiness from external sources, must kick that addictive habit and learn to earn happiness by setting and achieving goals

3. Men must stop getting sucked into the no-win game of making women happy. If women aren’t happy when you meet them, find other women who already are happy.

About the Author

Marc H. Rudov is an investment banker and business consultant residing in Silicon Valley, CA. He is the author of the book The Man’s No-Nonsense Guide to Women: How to Succeed in Romance on Planet Earth^TM (ISBN 0974501719) and 15 articles:

• “Five Myths About Women”
  


• “Romance Lessons from Tsunami Animals”


• “The Golden Rule Dictates Your Sex Life”


• “Why Men Dread Valentine’s Day”


• “How Every Man Can Land His Dream Woman”


• “Cellular Compatibility & Great Sex”


• “Can Men and Women Really Get Along?”


• “Why Men Avoid Commitment”


• “Did Your Make Your New Year’s Revolution?”


• “Will She Call 911 on You?”


• “Will Women Halt the Death of Marriage?”


• “BreakUp Means BreakUp!


• “Love Hurts”


• “The Power of Aural Sex”


• “If Women Were Happy

Rudov’s book, articles, blog, and podcasts are available at www.TheNoNonsenseMan.com. Copyright © 2006 by Marc H. Rudov. All rights reserved.