You’re a teenager. You want to do it but you know you shouldn’t. The consequences are bad. You might regret it later. But still you think about it constantly and you want to do it so badly! You make a little start — but pull away — and . . . oh, you just...
Despite the hopes of many University of Wisconsin at Madison students, The Onion was not named after their student center. “People always ask questions about where the name The Onion came from,” said President Sean Mills in an interview with David Shankbone, “and when I recently asked Tim Keck, who was one of the...
Despite the hopes of many University of Wisconsin at Madison students, The Onion was not named after their student center. “People always ask questions about where the name The Onion came from,” said President Sean Mills in an interview with David Shankbone, “and when I recently asked Tim Keck, who was one of the...
I listened to a cassette version of Harold Bloom’s fascinating The Book of J. Bloom expounds on a collection of sections of the Old Testament that he believes were written by a single author – an ironic and humorous author of similar stature to Shakespeare and Chaucer. I was particularly struck by Bloom’s analysis...
There is a great debate raging in America right now, and for once it doesn’t have to do with who should have been voted off “Dancing With the Stars.†(On a side note, shouldn’t a show called “Dancing With the Stars†actually have stars?) The debate is whether we’re ready for a female President....
Most people are probably familiar with the fact that conservative Republican Louisiana Senator David Vitter, known for his support of traditional family values, has ‘fessed up to seeing prostitutes. It is also widely reported that he had the pros put him in diapers. In one of the commercials he made while campaigning, David Vitter...
Four films for fun ways to creep out your Halloween! Since Halloween is coming up and I am a movie buff, I will devote this column to four films that I think are wonderfully eerie and that will help people get in the mood to appropriately celebrate Halloween. 1) The Halfway House (2004). I...
A recent Washington Post/ABC News poll reflected something surprising and not-so-surprising involving former First Lady and Democrat Presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton. First, the not-so-surprising news: the poll showed she was supported by 53% of the people surveyed. Not unusual, considering she’s been in the public eye for going on 15 years. What is surprising...
In First Samuel Chapter 18, verse 20 tells us that “Michal Saul’s daughter loved David: and they told Saul, and the thing pleased him.†That sounds very pleasant. However, the next verse informs us that it was not so nice: “And Saul said, I will give him her, that she may be a snare...
Did you know that there is a Bald and Free Day? Actually, there are TWO Bald and Free Days only one week apart. According to Holiday Insights, Bald and Free Day is either on October 7 or October 14. However, Holiday Insights states that “today†– whichever “today†– is “a day to cherish...
Did you know that there is a Bald and Free Day? Actually, there are TWO Bald and Free Days only one week apart. According to Holiday Insights, Bald and Free Day is either on October 7 or October 14. However, Holiday Insights states that “today†– whichever “today†– is “a day to cherish...
There’s a billboard on my route home from work showing a victim of Parkinson’s Disease without health insurance. The caption makes reference to this fact and says the combination of no health insurance and the disease is a “deadly combination.†(Just like Dr. Pepper and arsenic, though I’m not sure why you’d ruin the...
The lamestream media has publicly announced that: Brilliant democrat political advisor James Carville, with a brilliant and ground-breaking new strategy, is asking the public for slogans for the democrat party. He denies it is a tacit admission that we, the people, may be more capable of expressing what’s important to us than the leadership...
To hear the media talk about the Iowa Straw Poll, it was more important than the Iowa Caucuses, the Republican National Convention, and Election Day 2008 put together. And when you consider these folks think Iowa as a whole isn’t much more exciting than Amish street mimes, it must take a big event to...
Penny Patterson has said of herself, her longtime companion Ron Cohn, her adopted gorilla daughter Koko, her adopted gorilla son, the late Michael, that “we function as a family, albeit a weird one.†In some ways, however, that family is traditional, hearkening back to the 1950s and previous eras in its division of sex...
Author’s Note: This article was originally published several years ago in The Caribbean Express, a newsmagazine that is out of business. I think the piece is appropriate because September 19 is International Talk Like A Pirate Day, a fun day created by John Baur and Mark Summers who came up with the concept for...
O.J Simpson was questioned by Las Vegas police in connection with an alleged theft at the Palace Station Hotel and Casino last night. Details are sketchy, but it appears that several men broke into a sports memorabilia dealer’s room and stole mementos at gunpoint which once belonged to Simpson. According to declarations made by...
I have more than one reaction to the now famous audiotape of the interview between Senator Larry Craig and arresting officer Sgt. Dave Karsnia. The first is that Sen. Craig just MIGHT be telling the truth largely because Sgt. Dave Karsnia had such a tedious assignment. He had to hang around that airport restroom...
I have more than one reaction to the now famous audiotape of the interview between Senator Larry Craig and arresting officer Sgt. Dave Karsnia. The first is that Sen. Craig just MIGHT be telling the truth largely because Sgt. Dave Karsnia had such a tedious assignment. He had to hang around that airport restroom...
For some time now, the Jerry Springer Show has featured a character called the Rev. Shnorr. Supposedly a Christian minister, he carries around a Bible that has a yellow cover. Rev. Shnorr is drunken and disheveled. He sports about two days worth of beard growth and uncombed hair. He usually appears slightly drunk and...
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