The Call of the Child
By way of leading up to this article in Slate's XX blog, several years ago I was watching one of those "The Week in Washington" political roundup shows (Slate, 7/2/09). The lead-in was a long panning shot of the Mall in DC. As the camera moved along the Mall, it passed over two women who were seated cross-legged on the grass facing each other. They looked to be in their late thirties or early forties. They were playing pat-a-cake.
Not long afterward, my wife and I were on a rafting trip with some friends on the Colorado and Green Rivers in Utah. Thrown together with our group were three women, unknown to us, again in their forties. At one point, to the embarrassment and chagrin of my group, these three women struck up a rousing version of the "Mickey Mouse Club Theme Song."
Now comes this piece in Slate about the adult "romper." For the untutored, that turns out to be an article of apparel for women. In fact, you've seen them many times, but worn by toddlers. It's a little one-piece playsuit that parents have dressed little ones in since the turn of the 20th century. But now it's become an item for adults too, and that's made the XX Blog wonder, "What does this mean?" and conclude,
Rompers are the latest in a long line of infantilizing sartorial choices, along with ruffle-overloaded baby doll dresses and vintage T-shirts with cartoons on them. Nobody, it seems, wants to grow up anymore. People in their 20s are experiencing an extended adolescence. Grups dress like a version of themselves from 20 years ago. Moms buy Disney pajamas to match their children’s. It’s all pretty embarrassing, except when it’s disturbing.
Feminists have always been pretty sensitive to the "infantilization" of women. Barbara Ehrenreich had an extended piece some years ago in Harpers Monthly in which she criticized the breast cancer awareness movement's iconic pink teddy bear for its "infantilization" of women. What struck me about her piece was that the breast cancer awareness movement consists overwhelmingly of women. The adults buying rompers are women. The people I mentioned in my first two paragraphs were women. In short, women are infantilizing themselves.
Once you get sensitized to the fact, you see it everywhere and often. Perfectly grown-up women affect little-girl voices and act and dress like children, and it's all considered perfectly natural. The women playing pat-a-cake on the Mall didn't seem the least bit self-conscious, even as the camera recorded their every pat. I've seen it countless times and I can't recall a single instance of anyone pointing out how bizarre it is for a woman to act like a child. I wonder what they themselves think of their behavior.
Now, of course most women, thank goodness, act like adults. But a sizeable minority don't and I suspect that many more engage in that behavior from time to time.
All of that would be fine if it weren't for the concept of women's equality. To their credit, feminists have long cried 'foul' and well they might. There are a lot of messages out there in the ether that urge us to respect women and treat them as men's equals. But there are a fair number that say the opposite. The equanimity with which a good number of women choose to present themselves as less than adult encourages the notion that women don't merit equal respect. And again, it's women who are sending that message.
As if to underscore the point, the XX writer, Jessica Grose, having duly pointed out how an adult's wearing a child's playsuit tends to suggest she's deserving of a bit less respect than the rest of us, goes out shopping for one. Not only that, her article devolves into a kind of Consumer Reports on rompers. Grose gathers prices of various rompers, tries them on, reports how they look and how comfortable they are. In short, she advises her readers about how to find the best romper for their budgets.
Grose's bottom line: rompers infantilize women; here's the best one to buy. It's like I said; we're two-minded on the subject of women's equality and plenty of the fence-sitters are women.
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